Let’s be blunt. When everything is stripped away — titles, excuses, status, control — only one thing is left: How you made people feel. Not what you said.Not what you justified.Not how you saw yourself. What others actually lived with you. Some people leave behind a pattern of: And they often convince themselves it was… Read More What Legacy Will You Leave Behind?
When psychologists or risk assessors use tools like the HCR-20 or PCL-R, they are not guessing — they are looking for specific patterns that predict escalation or persistence. 🚩 High-Risk Red Flags These are the behaviours that raise serious concern because they are linked to ongoing or escalating harm: 1. Persistence Over Time 👉 Indicates: deeply ingrained behaviour, not situational 2.… Read More High-Risk vs Manageable Behaviour: What Professionals Look For
When psychologists assess someone with patterns like: they’re not just looking at incidents — they’re looking at patterns across time, thinking style, and likelihood of change. 1. Using the HCR-20 in This Context A professional would map behaviour like this: Historical (H) They would look for: 👉 This builds a picture of whether the behaviour is situational or lifelong.… Read More How These Assessments Apply in Real Situations
Here’s a clear, simple explanation of each of these tools — what they are, how they’re used, and what they actually assess: 1. HCR-20 (Historical, Clinical, Risk Management-20) This is a professional risk assessment tool used mainly by psychologists, psychiatrists, and forensic specialists to evaluate the likelihood of future violent behaviour. What it looks at: It is divided into… Read More The full psychological picture:
“Meanness is often a deep, enduring pattern. You can’t cure it with more giving, more patience, or more self-sacrifice.” That truth leads to an important question: Does meanness run in families? The answer is not simple — but patterns absolutely can repeat across generations. It’s Not Just Personality — It’s Learned Behaviour Children don’t just… Read More Does Meanness Run in Families? Understanding Patterns That Seem to Pass Down Generations
At first glance, it can seem confusing — even contradictory — when someone aligns themselves with people they clearly don’t like, simply because there is something to gain. But neuroscience helps explain this behaviour. 1. Reward Overrides Authenticity The brain is wired to seek reward. When there is a perceived benefit — money, status, access,… Read More Why People Align With Others They Don’t Even Like — The Neuroscience Behind It
You cannot change someone else’s values, no matter how much you explain, justify, or hope they will see things differently. People act from who they are — their beliefs, their patterns, and what they prioritise. But what you can control is yourself. Protecting your values means: Because integrity is not about what others do — it’s about… Read More Protecting Your Values in a World That Doesn’t Always Share Them
Most people understand fairness. They understand balance — giving, taking, contributing, respecting others. But there are some individuals who operate very differently. They show up when something is free.They are present when someone else is paying.They benefit where they can — regardless of relationships, values, or integrity. And often, they will align themselves with people… Read More When People Take Advantage: The Psychology of Entitlement and Lack of Integrity
Low impulse control becomes much more significant — and more harmful — when it shows up in abusive or high-conflict personalities. Here’s how it typically plays out: 1. Fast Emotional Reactions Turn Into Harmful Behaviour In these personalities, emotions (especially anger, frustration, or feeling “disrespected”) rise very quickly — and there’s little pause before acting. So… Read More Abusive or high-conflict personalities.
Low impulse control means having difficulty stopping yourself from acting on urges, emotions, or thoughts in the moment — even when you know the action might have negative consequences. It’s not about intelligence or knowing right from wrong. It’s about the gap between feeling something and being able to pause before acting on it. What it looks like in… Read More Low impulse control
Linda C J Turner | Trauma Therapist & Emotional Healing Specialist 