Behaviour	What it means	What happens to the other person’s suffering?	Example
Ordinary cruelty	Deliberately causing pain, humiliation or distress, or showing a serious disregard for another person’s suffering	The suffering is known but disregarded	Knowing someone is already distressed and deliberately saying something designed to hurt or humiliate them
Bullying	Repeated behaviour intended to intimidate, dominate, humiliate or undermine another person	The person’s fear, embarrassment or distress becomes part of the pattern of control	Repeatedly mocking, threatening, isolating or belittling someone to make them feel powerless
Anger	An emotional state involving frustration, threat, injustice or perceived provocation	Suffering may be an unintended consequence, although anger can become harmful when expressed aggressively	Someone loses their temper and shouts during an argument, frightening the other person
Abusive behaviour	A broader pattern of behaviour used to harm, control, intimidate, manipulate or exploit another person	The person’s suffering is often ignored, minimised or used as leverage	Threatening, controlling finances, monitoring someone, humiliating them or deliberately isolating them
Exploitative behaviour	Using another person’s vulnerability, trust, resources or circumstances for personal advantage	Vulnerability becomes an opportunity to obtain something	Pressuring someone who is ill or hospitalised to provide money, passwords or financial access
Coercive behaviour	Using pressure, threats, intimidation or manipulation to restrict another person’s choices	Fear or distress can become the mechanism through which compliance is obtained	“If you don’t do this, I’ll make things much worse for you.”
Moral disengagement	Psychological justification that allows someone to behave harmfully without fully confronting the moral implications	The suffering is minimised, justified, blamed on the victim or mentally excluded	“They deserve it.” / “It’s their own fault.” / “I’m only taking what I’m entitled to.”
Sadistic behaviour	Deliberately causing suffering where the person’s pain, fear or humiliation is itself gratifying or rewarding	The suffering is not merely tolerated—it may be part of the desired outcome	Deliberately frightening or humiliating someone and taking satisfaction from seeing them distressed

The important difference

The most useful distinction is what role the other person’s suffering plays.

Anger:
“I’m angry, and I am behaving badly.”

Cruelty:
“I know this hurts you, and I don’t care enough to stop.”

Bullying:
“Your fear and humiliation help me dominate you.”

Abuse:
“I am using behaviour that harms or controls you.”

Exploitation:
“Your vulnerability gives me an opportunity to benefit.”

Moral disengagement:
“I can justify what I’m doing so I don’t have to confront the fact that it is harmful.”

Sadism:
“Your suffering itself gives me satisfaction.”

One particularly important distinction

Not every cruel or abusive person is sadistic.

A person can cause enormous psychological damage without taking pleasure in the victim’s suffering. They may be motivated by control, entitlement, revenge, money, jealousy, self-interest or indifference.

Likewise, someone can experience anger without being abusive. The emotion of anger is not the same thing as the behaviour expressed through it.

What matters clinically and ethically is the pattern:

What did they do?
Did they know it would cause suffering?
Did they continue after seeing the consequences?
Did they use the person’s vulnerability to obtain something?
Did they take responsibility—or justify, minimise and blame?
And did the suffering matter to them?

That last question helps distinguish cruelty, exploitation and moral disengagement from sadism without casually diagnosing someone’s personality.