Category: LINDA C J TURNER – Trauma Therapist

Seismic Fallouts

Need for Control
For some, control is a way to feel safe or powerful. If they believe the relationship is slipping out of their grasp, they might resort to manipulative or harmful actions to reassert dominance. Even from a distance, they may seek to control the narrative, the emotions, or the lives of those they perceive as having wronged them.

Inability to Accept Responsibility
Admitting fault or accepting their role in the breakdown of the relationship may feel unbearable. Instead of owning up to their actions, they project blame outward, using abuse or sabotage to deflect attention from their own shortcomings.Vindictiveness and the Desire for Revenge
If they perceive themselves as the victim, even if they’re the one causing harm, they may justify their behavior as payback. This warped sense of justice can drive them to destroy the relationship further, believing it’s “deserved.”… Read More Seismic Fallouts

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Kindness

These moments of care and consideration become a mirror, reflecting back to you the truth you might have lost sight of: you’re valuable, worthy, and lovable just as you are. And from this place of being heard, you might even find yourself opening up more, daring to dream again, and embracing the fullness of your authentic self. This is where healing turns into thriving. 💛… Read More Kindness

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Transformed

When someone comes along and presses all the right buttons, it’s not just about them; it’s about the version of you that they reflect back. They see you for who you are, and in doing so, they remind you of who you’ve always been underneath the layers of suppression and control. This can feel miraculous, almost like rediscovering a part of your soul that had been hidden away.… Read More Transformed

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Struggling and Dismissed

It’s important to remember that people who dismiss or belittle others often do so because they don’t fully understand the situation or they’re uncomfortable with it. Sometimes it’s their way of deflecting, because they might not have the tools to offer support, or they may lack the emotional capacity to deal with difficult subjects. But that doesn’t make your struggles any less valid. In fact, it’s often a sign that your feelings are challenging their own beliefs or worldview.

When you’re being met with that kind of dismissal, it’s worth checking in with yourself and reminding yourself that your emotions are real, even if others can’t see or acknowledge that. Having a support network of people who do understand your situation can make a world of difference. If you don’t have that right now, working on creating those safe spaces—whether through therapy, trusted friends, or support groups—can help you hold on to your own sense of reality and self-worth.… Read More Struggling and Dismissed

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The Power of Manipulation and Emotional Dependency

Manipulation in abusive relationships isn’t always obvious or overt. It’s subtle and can be embedded in the fabric of everyday interactions. Abusers often employ tactics like gaslighting, which makes the victim doubt their reality and self-worth. Over time, this can create an emotional dependency. The victim may begin to feel like they can’t trust their own instincts or perception of events, leaving them more vulnerable to the abuser’s control.

The victim often feels that the only way to feel “normal” or loved again is through the abuser’s approval, even when they know deep down that the relationship is toxic. The abuser may alternate between love-bombing and cruel treatment, further deepening this emotional rollercoaster. This dependency on the highs and lows of the relationship—along with the belief that the abuser is the only one who can provide that emotional stimulation—creates a very complex emotional attachment.… Read More The Power of Manipulation and Emotional Dependency

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Truth

However, the truth always has a way of coming to light, no matter how much someone tries to deny it. The challenge is finding the strength to stay grounded in your own reality and not let their denials distort your sense of self. Keeping a focus on the facts and your own healing, rather than engaging in their games, will give you the peace of mind that ultimately, the truth will be recognized for what it is.… Read More Truth

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Impact on Brain Structure

When discussing the impact of long-term abuse on the brain, functional and structural imaging techniques like SPECT (Single Photon Emission Computed Tomography) scans, MRI (Magnetic Resonance Imaging), and PET (Positron Emission Tomography) scans are sometimes referenced in research. These types of scans are used to observe changes in brain activity or structure over time, especially in individuals who have experienced prolonged trauma or abuse.… Read More Impact on Brain Structure

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