A few relevant concepts:

1. Coercive control (behavioural pattern, not a diagnosis)
This is when one party keeps influence over another by creating uncertainty, dependency, or repeated disruption of progress. In practical terms it can look like:

• moving deadlines repeatedly
• requiring new conditions before agreeing
• delaying decisions even when agreement seems possible
• keeping the other party in a “waiting state”

The effect is often stress, exhaustion, and loss of momentum.

2. Intermittent reinforcement (reward system effect)
From a neuroscience perspective, the brain is very sensitive to unpredictable outcomes. When cooperation happens sometimes but not consistently:

• dopamine reward systems get “stuck” in anticipation mode
• the situation feels more consuming and urgent than it objectively is
• you feel compelled to keep responding quickly to regain control of the outcome

This is the same mechanism that makes gambling addictive.

3. Cognitive load / decision fatigue
Repeated changes force everyone involved to:

• re-plan schedules
• renegotiate logistics
• stay on alert

Over time, people become less rational and more reactive simply because their mental bandwidth is overloaded.

4. Strategic delay in negotiations (important distinction)
In property or legal contexts, delays are not always psychological control. They can also be:

• leverage tactics (waiting to pressure price or terms)
• internal coordination issues (lawyers, agents, multiple parties)
• risk avoidance (“we won’t commit until everything is perfect”)

The outward behaviour can look similar whether it’s intentional control or just procedural friction.

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The key grounding point

What is real and observable is:

• repeated delay
• lack of commitment despite agreement on price
• shifting conditions

Those are negotiation facts you can respond to directly.

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