When I began documenting what had happened to me, I made a promise to myself. No stone would be left unturned. Every document would be preserved. Every photograph. Every medical record. Every psychological assessment. Every email. Every text message. Every WhatsApp conversation. Every witness. Every piece of evidence. If it is relevant, it deserves to… Read More No Stone Left Unturned
One of the biggest misconceptions about domestic abuse is that once the divorce is final and the financial settlement has been agreed, everything is over. It isn’t. A divorce legally ends a marriage. A financial settlement divides assets and resolves financial claims between spouses. Neither necessarily addresses the physical, emotional or psychological harm caused by… Read More Can You Still Take Your Abuse Case to Court After the Divorce and Financial Settlement?
For generations, domestic abuse was often viewed as a “private family matter.” Unless there were visible injuries, many survivors were dismissed, disbelieved, or told to simply “work things out.” Today, the courts are beginning to recognise a truth that survivors have always known: abuse leaves wounds that cannot always be seen. A recent Canadian court… Read More The Hidden Wounds of Domestic Abuse: Why Justice Must Recognise More Than Bruises
The case is significant not only because of the extreme violence described, but because the court recognized that long-term intimate-partner violence can justify a substantial civil damages award. Justice Susan Vella of the Ontario Superior Court of Justice awarded the woman $400,000 in damages after a nine-day trial. The decision followed a 54-year marriage in which the judge found… Read More Landmark Canadian domestic-abuse judgment.
Trust is not built on promises. It is built on honesty. On consistency. On knowing that the person sitting opposite you is living in the same reality that you are. Without truth, trust has nowhere to take root. Relationships Are Built on Shared Reality Every healthy relationship depends on one simple foundation: We both agree… Read More Trust Cannot Grow Where Truth Is Absent
One of the greatest lessons I have learned is this: Never apologise for expecting a kind, generous and loving life. For years, I was told I had been “spoilt” because of the way I had been brought up. The irony is that what I experienced growing up wasn’t extravagance. It was simply normal. My mother was… Read More Never Lower Your Standards to Fit Someone Else’s Limitations
One of the clearest lessons I have learned is this: Pay attention to how someone treats those who are most vulnerable. Not how they treat people they want to impress. Not how they behave when others are watching. But how they treat those who have little power to defend themselves. Children. Older people. Animals. A… Read More When Cruelty Becomes a Pattern
When starting a new relationship, it is natural to focus on chemistry, attraction and hope for the future. But psychology reminds us that past patterns deserve careful attention. If someone has been through two relationships in which abuse has been alleged or found, it doesn’t automatically mean they are abusive in every future relationship. Allegations and legal… Read More Twice Divorced Following Allegations of Abuse: Signs You Shouldn’t Ignore
One question I hear surprisingly often is: “Why is his ex-wife still watching me?” Sometimes it isn’t just your social media. It’s your children’s. Your family members’. Your friends’. Months or even years after the relationship has ended, she still seems interested in what is happening in your life. Why? The honest answer is that only… Read More Why Is His Ex-Wife Still Watching You? The Psychology of Social Media Monitoring
One of the most valuable lessons neuroscience and psychology teach us is this: Behaviour that is repeated over many years often becomes a deeply ingrained habit. Our brains become efficient at repeating behaviours that have produced a desired outcome in the past. Through reinforcement and habit formation, certain ways of thinking and acting can become… Read More Observe the Pattern, Not Just the Person
Trauma • Neuroscience • Emotional Intelligence • Women's Empowerment 