Addiction, Trauma & the Brain

Addiction, Trauma & the Brain Addiction can be difficult to understand — both for the person experiencing it and for the people around them. My approach looks at addiction through both neuroscience and psychology, recognising that addictive behaviour can involve changes in the brain’s reward, motivation, learning, stress and self-regulation systems. Addiction can involve alcohol, recreational drugs… Read More Addiction, Trauma & the Brain

The Neuroscience and Psychology of Sadistic Behaviour: Why Cruelty Can Become Addictive

One of the most difficult questions survivors ask is: “How could someone enjoy causing another person so much pain?” For those who have never experienced coercive control, emotional abuse, or psychological manipulation, the idea that another human being could derive satisfaction from another person’s suffering seems incomprehensible. Yet psychology and neuroscience provide important insights into… Read More The Neuroscience and Psychology of Sadistic Behaviour: Why Cruelty Can Become Addictive

Why Do Some People Ignore a Cry for Help? The Psychology and Neuroscience Behind It

One of the most painful experiences a person can have is finding the courage to ask for help… only to be ignored. The silence can be deafening. For the person reaching out, it can feel like confirmation that they don’t matter. For the person who ignores them, however, the reasons are often far more psychologically… Read More Why Do Some People Ignore a Cry for Help? The Psychology and Neuroscience Behind It

Freedom Feels Different: The Neuroscience of Living Without Control

This year, I’ve been to every local fiesta, celebration, concert, and community event in my town. For the first time in many years, I stayed until I wanted to leave. I laughed without looking over my shoulder. I joined in without worrying about being criticised. I enjoyed the music, the atmosphere, and the company without… Read More Freedom Feels Different: The Neuroscience of Living Without Control

“You Look Different”: The Neuroscience of Finally Feeling Safe

One of the most unexpected parts of healing has not been what I see in myself, but what other people see in me. Recently, friends, family, and even people I haven’t seen for a while have been making similar comments. “You look so much more relaxed.” “You seem more confident.” “You’re glowing.” “You smile so… Read More “You Look Different”: The Neuroscience of Finally Feeling Safe

“He Never Wanted Me to Be Happy”: The Psychology and Neuroscience Behind This Behaviour

During a conversation this morning, someone said something that resonated deeply with me: “He never wanted you to be happy. He was so miserable with his own life and himself long before he met you that he was determined to destroy any happiness you experienced.” Whether or not we can ever know another person’s true… Read More “He Never Wanted Me to Be Happy”: The Psychology and Neuroscience Behind This Behaviour

Five Moves. One Pattern. The Neuroscience and Psychology of Carrying Everything Alone.

As I prepare for my fifth and final move, I’m struck by something I hadn’t fully appreciated before. I’ve spent decades moving homes. But more than that… I’ve spent decades moving almost entirely on my own. The first move was into his house. The second was into the home I bought myself. While I packed… Read More Five Moves. One Pattern. The Neuroscience and Psychology of Carrying Everything Alone.

Why Do Friends and Family Sometimes Notice a Vindictive Personality Before You Do? The Psychology and Neuroscience Behind Chronic Vindictiveness

One of the questions people often ask after leaving a difficult relationship is: “Why did everyone else seem to notice long before I did?” It is surprisingly common to hear family members, friends, colleagues or even previous partners say, “We saw it years ago.” While this can be painful to hear, psychology offers several explanations for why… Read More Why Do Friends and Family Sometimes Notice a Vindictive Personality Before You Do? The Psychology and Neuroscience Behind Chronic Vindictiveness

The Psychology and Neuroscience of Vindictive Personalities: Why Some People Seem to Thrive on Revenge, Bitterness, and Jealousy

Most people have experienced moments of anger, resentment, or envy. These emotions are part of being human. For most, they pass with time, reflection, or forgiveness. However, there are some individuals for whom resentment becomes a way of life. They appear to take satisfaction in revenge, celebrate another person’s misfortune, or become deeply distressed when… Read More The Psychology and Neuroscience of Vindictive Personalities: Why Some People Seem to Thrive on Revenge, Bitterness, and Jealousy

You Are Not Broken — Your Nervous System is Protecting You

You Are Not Broken  Your nervous system is protecting you. Healing begins with safety, not urgency. Download Your Free Calming Guide 🌿 Book Your Free 15-Minute Consultation 🤍 If you are feeling anxious, overwhelmed, or emotionally exhausted, it’s natural to wonder if something is “wrong” with you. Truth: There is nothing wrong. Your nervous system has… Read More You Are Not Broken — Your Nervous System is Protecting You