Healing is a holistic and dynamic process that involves the restoration of physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being after experiencing challenges, trauma, or distress. Healing is not just the absence of symptoms; it encompasses a journey toward overall wellness and a sense of wholeness. The path to healing is unique for each individual and may involve a combination of self-care practices, professional support, and personal growth.
One of the most difficult things to explain about abuse is how quickly it can change a person’s sense of themselves. It can happen in minutes. A person who was confident, capable and independent can suddenly find themselves frightened, confused, humiliated and desperately trying to make sense of what is happening. It isn’t because they… Read More How an Abuser Can Make You Feel Like Nothing
There are several evidence-based approaches to treating trauma. The most appropriate treatment depends on the type of trauma, whether the danger has ended, the person’s symptoms, and whether the trauma was single-event or prolonged/complex. Main treatments for trauma Helps identify and change trauma-related thoughts, beliefs and behaviours. Often used for PTSD, anxiety and avoidance. Uses bilateral… Read More Main treatments for trauma
Trauma is not defined only by what happened; it also involves how the nervous system and mind respond to what happened. Different types of trauma Results from a single, overwhelming event. Examples: assault, serious accident, sudden bereavement, natural disaster, violent attack. Develops from repeated or ongoing exposure to threatening or harmful experiences. Examples: prolonged domestic… Read More Trauma is not defined only by what happened
Different types of abuse Hitting, kicking, punching or slapping Pushing, shaking or throwing someone Choking or strangulation Burning or causing injuries Using objects or weapons to hurt or threaten someone Preventing someone from leaving or physically restraining them Constant criticism, humiliation or insults Belittling someone or making them feel worthless Deliberately causing fear or distress… Read More Different types of abuse
Sometimes you don’t need someone to shout. You don’t need someone to threaten you. You don’t even need them to be in the same room. Sometimes the knowledge that they are there is enough. That is the power of intimidation. And after experiencing abuse, one of the greatest reliefs can be discovering what life feels like… Read More Intimidation: An Abuser’s Favourite Weapon
There comes a point in life when you finally stop negotiating with nonsense. I’ve reached mine. I am no longer putting up with bad behaviour, empty promises, abuse of any kind, meanness, misery or miserly behaviour. And before anyone gets worried, no — I haven’t suddenly become difficult. I’ve simply become awake. I Don’t Want a Project… Read More I’d Rather Be Alone Than Compromise
Once upon a time, I was an excellent candidate for the “Give Him Another Chance” Olympics. I could explain away almost anything. “He’s just tired.” “He’s had a difficult past.” “Maybe I misunderstood.” “He probably didn’t mean it like that.” “He says he cares, so perhaps I should focus on his words.” Oh, how wonderfully accommodating… Read More Three Strikes and You’re Out: My New Dating Philosophy
One of the first signs I noticed that I was truly healing wasn’t dramatic. It wasn’t a single breakthrough or a life-changing event. It was something much quieter. I stopped feeling exhausted all the time. For years, I lived as though I was running on empty. No matter how much I slept, I woke feeling… Read More When You Stop Feeling Constantly Exhausted
For years, I didn’t realise how deeply trauma had affected my sleep. I could fall asleep exhausted, yet wake feeling as though I hadn’t rested at all. My body slept, but my nervous system remained on guard, never quite believing it was safe enough to switch off completely. Many survivors of prolonged stress, domestic abuse,… Read More When Your Sleep Changes: A Quiet Sign Your Nervous System Is Healing
There is something happening to me that I didn’t expect from healing. I can feel the world again. Not emotionally overwhelmed by it. Not frightened by it. I can actually feel it. For years, my nervous system existed in a state of heightened alertness. When you live with domestic abuse, coercive control, unpredictability, or fear, your… Read More When You Stop Surviving and Start Feeling Life Again
