Author: Linda C J Turner

Linda CJ Turner Trauma & Relationship Specialist | Neuroscience & Emotional Regulation | Women 45+ | Emotional Abuse & Coercive Control Recovery You survived it. Now it’s time to heal from it.

When You Don’t See What Others See: The Gap Between Self-Perception and How Others See Us

Have you ever been told something about yourself repeatedly, yet somehow never really seen it yourself? Perhaps friends have said, “When you walk into a room, people notice you,” or “Men are always looking at you.” You may have laughed it off, dismissed it, or simply not understood what they meant. Even years later, you may still not particularly… Read More When You Don’t See What Others See: The Gap Between Self-Perception and How Others See Us

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When Cruelty Crosses The Line

Cruelty can be abuse, but cruelty and abuse are not interchangeable terms. A useful way to understand the progression is: Cruelty describes harmful treatment.Abuse describes a broader pattern of harmful, controlling, exploitative or coercive behaviour. When cruelty becomes repeated, deliberate and part of a pattern that causes physical, emotional, psychological or financial harm, it can properly… Read More When Cruelty Crosses The Line

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The important difference

Behaviour What it means What happens to the other person’s suffering? Example Ordinary cruelty Deliberately causing pain, humiliation or distress, or showing a serious disregard for another person’s suffering The suffering is known but disregarded Knowing someone is already distressed and deliberately saying something designed to hurt or humiliate them Bullying Repeated behaviour intended to intimidate,… Read More The important difference

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Cruelty, sadism and moral disengagement are not the same thing

By Linda C J Turner, Therapist & Advocate — Linda C J Turner Trauma Therapist | Neuroscience & Emotional Intelligence Practitioner | Advocate for Women’s Empowerment ©Linda C J Turner

Concept What it means Relationship to another person’s suffering Cruelty Deliberately causing or allowing suffering, pain, humiliation or distress The suffering is knowingly inflicted or disregarded Sadism Deriving gratification, pleasure or satisfaction from another person’s suffering or humiliation The suffering itself can become rewarding Moral disengagement Psychological processes that allow someone to harm or exploit… Read More Cruelty, sadism and moral disengagement are not the same thing

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When Vulnerability Becomes an Opportunity: The Psychology of Mercenary Behaviour

There are moments in life when human beings are at their most vulnerable. Illness. Hospitalisation. Bereavement. Divorce. Financial crisis. Family emergencies. Exhaustion. Fear. These are the moments when we instinctively expect the people around us to become more compassionate, not less. We expect a friend, partner, relative or trusted person to say: “How can I help?”… Read More When Vulnerability Becomes an Opportunity: The Psychology of Mercenary Behaviour

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And Then You Meet Someone Who Doesn’t Have to Perform Love

By Linda C J Turner, Therapist & Advocate — Linda C J Turner Trauma Therapist | Neuroscience & Emotional Intelligence Practitioner | Advocate for Women’s Empowerment ©Linda C J Turner © 2025 Linda Carol Turner. Content protected by copyright.
Reproduction or redistribution in any form requires prior written permission from the author.
When quoting or referencing, please cite: Linda Carol Turner, Psychology & Neuroscience Insights.

Sometimes you don’t fully understand what was missing from your previous relationship until you experience something completely different. You meet someone who doesn’t create theatre. They don’t need an audience. They don’t need to convince the world that they are loving. They simply are. The affection is there when nobody is watching. The respect is there… Read More And Then You Meet Someone Who Doesn’t Have to Perform Love

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The Two Faces of Betrayal: When the Public Image Is Nothing Like the Private Reality

By Linda C J Turner, Therapist & Advocate — Linda C J Turner Trauma Therapist | Neuroscience & Emotional Intelligence Practitioner | Advocate for Women’s Empowerment ©Linda C J Turner

There is a particular kind of behaviour that can be deeply disturbing because what you see on the surface bears little resemblance to what is happening underneath. They smile at you. They tell you everything is fine. They may sit beside you, sleep beside you, share your home and accept your financial support — while… Read More The Two Faces of Betrayal: When the Public Image Is Nothing Like the Private Reality

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The Two Faces of Betrayal: When Someone Smiles at You While Working Against You

There is a particular kind of behaviour that can be deeply unsettling because what you see on the surface bears little resemblance to what is happening underneath. They smile at you. They tell you everything is fine. They may sit beside you, sleep beside you, share your home, accept your money, depend upon you financially… Read More The Two Faces of Betrayal: When Someone Smiles at You While Working Against You

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When You Finally Meet Someone Who Feels Different

By Linda C J Turner, Therapist & Advocate — Linda C J Turner Trauma Therapist | Neuroscience & Emotional Intelligence Practitioner | Advocate for Women’s Empowerment ©Linda C J Turner

When kindness no longer feels like an exception And then, sometimes, you meet someone who feels completely different. Someone who smiles when they see you. Someone who listens — really listens. Someone who jokes with you. Someone who makes you laugh. Someone who is playful and spontaneous. Someone who shares. Someone who sings. Someone who… Read More When You Finally Meet Someone Who Feels Different

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