Tomorrow I meet with yet another psychologist — this one requested by my doctor — and once again, I will be asked to go back. Back through 30 years of pain, betrayal, violence, and gaslighting. I will be expected to explain what happened, how it made me feel, how it impacted my health, my relationships, my sense of safety. I will describe the bruises you can’t see — the ones that never fully fade.
It’s all documented:
🗂 15 pages of timelines, dates, names, events.
👮♀️ Police reports.
🧠 Psychologist assessments.
🧾 Witness statements.
📄 Documents in two languages — English and Spanish — prepared for the court by certified translators.
It’s not a vague memory. It’s a case file. A truth carved into decades of paperwork, signed by professionals, stamped with the trauma I still carry.
And yet… I will be asked to prove it all over again. To relive every physical attack, every threat, every cruel silence on my birthday. Every Christmas where I smiled through tears while walking on eggshells. Every moment I begged for emotional safety and received manipulation instead. Because that’s the price survivors pay — not just for surviving, but for daring to speak.
Meanwhile, he walks freely.
Living his life.
Protected by silence.
Enabled by those who know the truth and choose to look away.
Backed by family who laugh, dismiss, or pretend it never happened.
This is what retraumatisation looks like.
This is the invisible toll.
This is what survivors endure not just during the abuse, but long after it ends — if it ever truly ends.
I don’t post this for sympathy.
I post this for awareness.
For the women who are being told it’s in their head.
For the ones still being asked, “Why didn’t you leave sooner?”
For the ones who did everything right and are still being dragged through endless hoops while the abuser moves on without consequence.
If you’ve ever wondered what strength looks like,
It’s this.
Not just surviving the abuse,
But telling the story again —
Clearly, painfully, truthfully —
Even when it costs you everything.
I see you.
I stand with you.
And I won’t be silenced.
#TraumaRecovery #JusticeForSurvivors #EmotionalAbuse #PsychologicalAbuse #CoerciveControl #SurvivorStrong #PostSeparationAbuse #TruthMatters #InvisibleScars #ReclaimYourVoice #RelivingItAgain #HealingInTruth
