When a person suspects something as severe as illicit images involving minors, yet the family minimizes, dismisses, or normalizes it — it creates a psychological trap.
Let’s unpack this clearly in a psychologically grounded, survivor-sensitive article for social media and awareness campaigns:
🧠 “It’s Normal, Don’t Worry”:
When Families Excuse the Inexcusable
Imagine this:
You come across something disturbing — a hidden photo, a suspicious folder, an inappropriate comment involving a child. Your gut twists. You bring it up nervously to a family member, and they say:
- “Oh, you’re overthinking it.”
- “Lots of people look at stuff like that online.”
- “He would never hurt a child, stop being dramatic.”
- “It’s not your business, just let it go.”
This is not just denial — it’s a form of enabling and secondary abuse. And if the person involved is violent or manipulative, this minimization can leave you feeling silenced, gaslit, and deeply unsafe.
🚨 Let’s Be Clear:
There is NOTHING normal about possessing or viewing illicit images of minors.
In most countries, including Spain:
- Possession = Criminal offense
- Distribution = Aggravated felony
- Justifying it = Obstruction or enabling
- Ignoring it = Potential complicity
Minimizing these acts is dangerous — morally, legally, and psychologically.
💥 Why Families Minimize (Psychological Insight)
Families often dismiss or justify these behaviors because of:
🔹 Shame Avoidance: Accepting the truth would mean facing deep shame about someone they love or raised.
🔹 Cognitive Dissonance: They can’t reconcile the “loving uncle” or “charming brother” with the horrifying reality — so they reject the evidence instead.
🔹 Enmeshment & Toxic Loyalty: In some families, loyalty to “the family image” outweighs justice, truth, or victim safety.
🔹 Fear of Consequences: They may fear what will happen to the accused — legally, socially, financially — and prioritize his protection over children’s safety.
🧠 Psychological Toll on the Person Trying to Speak Up
If you’ve seen something suspicious and were met with:
- Gaslighting
- Silence
- “It’s normal, let it go”
- Or even threats for speaking out…
Then you’ve likely felt:
- Self-doubt
- Shame for “causing drama”
- Isolation
- Panic
- Paralyzing confusion
This is not your fault.
You are not being dramatic.
You are not overreacting.
You are trying to protect the vulnerable — and that is brave.
🔎 What To Do When the Family Covers for Someone Dangerous
- Don’t try to convince them again.
If they’ve minimized once, they may do it again — and this puts you at more risk. - Document what you know — safely.
Record details, dates, any reactions or threats. Store safely. - Tell someone outside the family.
A therapist, lawyer, or police contact will be far more reliable than relatives enmeshed in denial. - Report discreetly.
Use anonymous tip lines or report from a location they cannot trace. - Protect your mental health.
Being the only one who sees the truth is isolating. You may need trauma-informed support to process it.
🧾“It’s normal, everyone does it.”
If someone says this when you report illicit images involving children — know this:
🚫 It is NOT normal.
🚫 It is NOT excusable.
🚫 It is NOT okay.
Minimizing abuse is abuse.
Trust your gut. Speak to a therapist.
Get legal advice. Report it — safely.
