🌈 Variety Is the Spice of Life — And the Balm for the Soul
By Linda C J Turner | Therapist, Survivor, Advocate for Emotional Well-being
There’s a quiet kind of magic that happens when life becomes full of contrast: different people, varied conversations, new experiences, spontaneous get-togethers, holidays, and even quiet moments of reflection. After years of constraint, control, and emotional suppression, I now understand this truth deep in my bones:
💫 Variety isn’t chaos. It’s freedom. It’s healing. It’s life as it should be—lived fully.
🧠 The Psychology of Variety: Why It Matters
When someone has lived under emotional control or psychological abuse, life often becomes small. Choices are restricted. People are filtered. Experiences are dictated. And slowly, your world shrinks.
But when you step out of that, and begin to reconnect with the world on your terms, your mind begins to expand again. Psychologically, variety stimulates:
- Curiosity, which reignites joy.
- Autonomy, which rebuilds confidence.
- New perspectives, which help reframe the past and imagine a hopeful future.
- Connection, which repairs the emotional isolation that trauma creates.
Every new person you meet, every different conversation you have, gently tells your brain:
🧠 “There is more to life than what I knew. There is more to me than what I was told.”
🧬 The Neuroscience of a Rich, Varied Life
Our brains are plastic, which means they’re always changing and reshaping based on experience. When your days are filled with new sights, new voices, laughter, nature, music, and conversation, your brain begins to rewire itself for connection, safety, and joy.
Here’s what happens:
- Different environments stimulate multiple regions of the brain, improving mood, memory, and emotional resilience.
- Spending time with different people helps activate the social brain networks, supporting empathy, trust, and relational safety.
- Trying new hobbies or visiting new places triggers dopamine, the brain’s reward chemical, reinforcing positive behavior.
- Warm and safe interactions allow for co-regulation, calming the nervous system and building emotional safety.
In simple terms: Variety heals what monotony and control once suffocated.
🌍 How I’ve Built Variety into My Life
After decades of being emotionally boxed in, I’ve now intentionally filled my life with beautiful variety:
- Family and friends who get it and love me for who I truly am.
- Visitors who bring laughter and light into my space.
- Choir, padel, Pilates, long walks with my dog, lunches with old and new friends.
- A home filled with calm, freedom, and authenticity.
- A future filled with travel, exploration, and purpose.
Each day looks a little different—and I love that.
✨ A Life Lived Fully
Healing is not about returning to who you were before the trauma. It’s about discovering who you are beyond it. A varied life is a full life—and for those of us who have had our worlds shrink due to abuse or emotional suppression, variety becomes a form of liberation.
Different people.
Different hobbies.
Different environments.
Different conversations.
They aren’t just fun.
They are freedom in motion.
#VarietyIsHealing #EmotionalFreedom #LifeAfterAbuse #NeuroscienceOfJoy #HealingInColour #PsychologicalWellness #LindaCJTurnerTherapy #NewConnectionsNewLife #ThisIsWhatHealingLooksLike #ThrivingNotJustSurviving #DifferentIsBeautiful
