Even after the divorce is finalized, safety, boundaries, and emotional wellbeing remain top priorities. Survivors of abuse often face ongoing harassment, stalking, or attempts to manipulate outcomes.
1. Legal Protections
- Maintain restraining orders: Keep copies with you and update the court if the abuser breaches them.
- Enforce custody arrangements: Only allow contact under court-approved terms.
- Financial safeguards: Change bank accounts, credit cards, and passwords; prevent unauthorized access to shared assets.
- Property and mail security: Ensure your address is protected if possible; consider a P.O. box for correspondence.
2. Technology Safety
- Secure devices: Update passwords, enable two-factor authentication, and check for spyware.
- Monitor communications: Keep evidence of any threats or harassment via text, email, or social media.
- Limit personal information online: Adjust privacy settings and avoid sharing location or routines publicly.
3. Personal Safety Planning
- Change routines: Alter daily patterns if the abuser knows them.
- Safe spaces: Identify places where you feel secure—home, friends’ houses, community centers.
- Emergency contacts: Keep a trusted list of friends, family, or neighbors who can respond if needed.
- Emergency plan: Know local police numbers, shelters, or crisis hotlines.
4. Emotional and Psychological Protection
- Counselling or therapy: Helps process trauma and rebuild confidence.
- Support groups: Connect with others who understand abuse recovery.
- Boundaries: Limit or avoid contact with the abuser; use legal channels if communication is required.
- Self-care routines: Exercise, mindfulness, or hobbies can reduce stress and improve resilience.
5. Ongoing Monitoring and Documentation
- Keep a detailed record of any contact, threats, or harassment.
- Document breaches of restraining orders, stalking, or interference with custody.
- Use this information for police reports or legal follow-ups if necessary.
6. Rebuilding Autonomy
- Financial independence: Open new accounts, seek work opportunities, and separate finances fully.
- Social support: Reconnect with friends and family who respect your boundaries.
- Empowerment: Engage in activities and legal steps that reinforce control over your life.
Key Message: Post-divorce safety is about legal security, technological vigilance, emotional resilience, and clear boundaries. Protecting yourself is a continuous process, not a one-time action.
