Strangulation is not just an act of violence — it is one of the clearest predictors of escalating abuse and potential homicide in domestic violence cases. Survivors often underestimate the seriousness of this form of assault, sometimes due to the absence of visible injuries. But make no mistake: strangulation is a form of power and control with deadly implications.
Understanding Strangulation: What It Really Means
Strangulation is defined as the obstruction of blood vessels or airflow in the neck resulting in asphyxia. This can be done manually (with hands), with a ligature (rope, belt, scarf), or by hanging. In domestic abuse, it is most often manual.
Unlike other forms of physical abuse, strangulation is intensely intimate — it is the abuser’s hands around your neck, cutting off your ability to breathe, speak, or call for help. It sends a chilling psychological message: “I control whether you live or die.”
The Psychology Behind Strangulation
A High-Risk Marker of Lethality
Research shows that survivors who have been strangled by their partner are 750% more likely to be murdered by that partner in the future. One incident of strangulation is enough to consider the situation life-threatening.
Power, Control, and Terror
Strangulation is not about loss of control — it is a deliberate act designed to induce fear and submission. For many survivors, it is a turning point — a moment when they realize just how dangerous their abuser is. It’s not only an attempt to silence; it’s a warning of what may come next.
Psychological Trauma
Strangulation leaves deep psychological scars:
- Panic and terror: The fear of death in that moment is visceral and unforgettable.
- Loss of voice: Survivors often experience hoarseness or an inability to speak — symbolic of the silencing tactics used by abusers.
- Hypervigilance: The nervous system becomes dysregulated, leading to PTSD symptoms, including flashbacks, nightmares, and a constant state of alertness.
Physical Dangers: Even Without Bruising
Strangulation can cause internal injuries that may not be visible right away but can still be fatal days or weeks later:
- Brain damage due to lack of oxygen
- Stroke caused by damage to arteries in the neck
- Swelling of the throat, leading to delayed airway obstruction
- Voice changes, vision loss, or memory problems
- Miscarriage in pregnant survivors
Even if you “feel fine,” it is vital to seek medical attention immediately.
After Strangulation: What Comes Next?
If you’ve been strangled, it is time to leave. No more waiting, no more rationalizing. You are in a life-threatening situation.
Immediate Steps to Take
1. Seek Medical Help
Go to a hospital, urgent care center, or forensic nurse examiner trained in strangulation assessment. Ask for a CT scan of your neck and throat if possible. Insist, even if symptoms are not visible.
2. Document the Assault
Take photographs, write down your memory of the event, and speak to someone — a friend, therapist, or hotline — who can help create a record. If you’re in a country with strangulation-specific laws (like the UK, US, Australia), this documentation is critical for legal protection.
3. Create a Safety Plan
If you can’t leave immediately, start planning. Talk to a domestic violence advocate who can help you prepare:
- Where will you go?
- What essential items will you take?
- Who can you trust to support you?
4. Tell Someone You Trust
Strangulation should never be kept secret. Abusers rely on silence. Telling someone can literally save your life — and it keeps you connected to a lifeline when you might otherwise isolate.
5. Get Legal Protection
In many regions, strangulation is now a felony — even without visible injury. Report it if you’re ready. Protective orders are stronger when strangulation is part of the report.
Why Stranglers Are Especially Dangerous
Strangulation is often a precursor to femicide (the killing of women, often by intimate partners). But even when death does not occur, partners who strangle are likely to:
- Escalate in violence
- Stalk or track the survivor
- Attempt to reassert control after separation
- Use threats, manipulation, or legal systems to continue abuse
Stranglers do not stop. They view survival as defiance — and they may become even more dangerous when you leave.
Healing from Strangulation: The Emotional and Neurological Impact
Your body remembers what happened, even if your mind tries to forget.
Working with a Trauma Therapist
Strangulation trauma often leads to:
- Panic attacks
- Breathwork aversion
- Vagal nerve dysregulation
- Sleep disturbances
- Hyperarousal
A trauma-informed therapist trained in polyvagal theory, EMDR, or somatic experiencing can help rebuild nervous system safety, restore your voice (literally and metaphorically), and process the terror you’ve survived.
Body-Based Healing
Many survivors benefit from:
- Breathwork (with caution and support)
- Yoga or tai chi
- Vocal therapy to restore confidence and power
- Support groups, especially for survivors of domestic violence
You Are Not Overreacting — You Are Awakening
If you’re reading this and it’s happened to you — please know this: you are not crazy, dramatic, or weak. You are a survivor of an act of extreme, intimate, and deliberate violence. Your intuition — the sense that this was different, that this was the last straw — is absolutely right.
Leaving is not just brave. It is vital.
You Deserve to Breathe Freely Again
Strangulation is the symbolic and literal removal of your breath — your voice, your life force. But you are still here. And as long as you are here, there is hope.
You deserve to be safe.
You deserve to be heard.
You deserve to heal.
And you deserve a life where no one ever wraps their hands around your neck again.
