By Linda C J Turner, Therapist & Advocate
There comes a point in healing where you stop just surviving…
and start choosing — actively, fiercely, and unapologetically.
Not out of bitterness. Not to prove a point.
But because you finally know your worth.
✨ I choose kindness over cruelty.
Because I know what it feels like to walk on eggshells, to brace myself for criticism, to feel the sting of words used as weapons.
Kindness is not weakness — it’s a radical act of strength.
It creates safety. It softens pain. It nourishes connection.
Cruelty, no matter how it’s disguised — as “tough love” or “just being honest” — is still cruelty.
✨ I choose safety over danger.
Emotional safety is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship — romantic, familial, or professional.
If I have to trade my peace for someone else’s comfort, I’m no longer interested.
No relationship is worth staying in if it puts your nervous system into constant fight-or-flight.
✨ I choose honesty over lies.
Because lies, even small ones, erode trust like slow acid.
I’ve lived in houses built on half-truths and secrets.
Now, I want the kind of honesty that holds your hand, not the kind that throws daggers.
Truth, spoken with empathy, creates clarity — and clarity is freedom.
✨ I choose choices over manipulation.
Manipulation is the art of control disguised as care.
It’s subtle. It’s confusing. It sounds like:
– “If you loved me, you would…”
– “You’re the one making this difficult.”
I now understand that real love gives options, not ultimatums.
I choose agency. I choose informed, empowered decisions.
✨ I choose love over hate.
Not romanticized love.
Not the kind of love that demands your silence, your sacrifice, or your soul.
But real love — rooted in respect, boundaries, warmth, and reciprocity.
Hate destroys the hater far more than the hated.
I choose love — not because it’s easy, but because it’s the only thing that heals.
✨ I choose empathy over indifference.
Because apathy is a cold place to live.
Because I’ve felt the pain of being met with silence, shrugged shoulders, and blank stares when all I wanted was to be seen.
Empathy says: “I may not fully understand, but I’m here. And I care.”
And that kind of connection? That saves lives.
🧠 From a Psychological Lens
Each of these choices reflects a deeper shift in your nervous system and identity.
Healing isn’t just about letting go — it’s about choosing differently.
🔁 Where once your trauma picked people for you — now you do.
🔁 Where survival dictated your behavior — now intention does.
🔁 Where fear ruled your responses — now awareness leads the way.
💬 Ask Yourself Today:
– What am I no longer available for?
– Which values guide my relationships now?
– Who makes me feel safe, not small?
💛 This Is Not Bitterness. This Is Clarity.
You are allowed to choose differently now.
You are allowed to want peace over chaos.
And you are allowed to rewrite the story — not for anyone else’s approval, but for your own healing.
Say it with me:
✨ I choose kindness.
✨ I choose safety.
✨ I choose honesty.
✨ I choose freedom.
✨ I choose love.
✨ I choose empathy.
✨ I choose me.
— Linda C J Turner
Trauma Therapist | Neuroscience & Emotional Intelligence Practitioner | Advocate for Women’s Empowerment
