Actions speak louder than words, and in situations like these, claiming to “still love” someone while actively working to undermine their well-being, dignity, or security is deeply contradictory. Love is not just a feeling we profess—it’s demonstrated through respect, kindness, and fairness. Stripping someone of what is rightfully theirs or attempting to manipulate circumstances to their detriment is far from loving; it’s controlling and often deeply hurtful.

The Disconnect Between Words and Actions

It’s one thing to say you love someone, but love without actions to back it up is hollow. Writing someone out of a will, attempting to take everything from them, or trying to break their spirit are not actions born out of care or affection. These actions reflect something else entirely—perhaps bitterness, resentment, or a desire for control. When someone behaves in this way, their declaration of love feels not just empty but hypocritical.

The Impact on the Other Person

For the person on the receiving end of this treatment—like the wife in this scenario—the emotional toll can be profound. They’re not just losing material security but also grappling with the heartbreak of betrayal. Imagine being told you’re loved while simultaneously being stripped of your autonomy or future stability. It creates a painful dissonance: how can someone who claims to care so deeply act in a way that feels so cruel?

This kind of behavior can erode trust, self-esteem, and faith in the relationship. Over time, it leaves scars that are difficult to heal, especially if the person perpetrating the harm continues to justify their actions with empty declarations of love.

The Justification and Excuses

Some people might justify these actions by framing them as practical or necessary, claiming that “it’s just business” or that they’re thinking about “what’s best.” However, when it involves someone you profess to love, these justifications ring hollow. True love involves partnership, mutual respect, and the acknowledgment of the other person’s worth—not just emotionally but also in shared contributions and rights.

A Call for Self-Reflection

For the individual engaging in such behavior, it’s crucial to reflect on what their actions say about their values and priorities. If love is truly present, there should be a willingness to act in a way that uplifts and protects the other person, even if the relationship is changing or ending. Stripping someone of their agency or trying to control them financially is not love—it’s a misuse of power.

A Message for Those Hurt

If you’ve been on the receiving end of such actions, remember this: love that hurts, belittles, or tries to break you isn’t love at all. You deserve kindness, fairness, and respect, no matter the circumstances. It’s okay to stand up for yourself, to demand what’s rightfully yours, and to protect your emotional and financial well-being. And most importantly, don’t let someone else’s harmful behavior define your worth or diminish your strength.