It’s incredibly painful when you’re the victim of abuse and find that the people around you, especially those who should be supportive, fail to recognize or acknowledge your suffering. Being driven out of your home, physically abused, manipulated, and then having your experiences dismissed or ignored by the abuser’s family adds a whole other layer of betrayal.
When family members turn a blind eye, it feels like they’re complicit in the abuse or, at the very least, prioritizing their own comfort over your well-being. It’s like you’re not just fighting against the abuser but against an entire network of silence and denial. That sense of isolation can be suffocating.
The worst part is, when they make it all about themselves, it can leave you questioning your own reality. You might even start doubting yourself—”Was it really that bad? Should I have stayed quiet?”—which is exactly what abusers and their enablers want. They don’t want to confront the truth because it’s easier for them to vilify the victim than to acknowledge the deep dysfunction and harm.
Sending a message to defend yourself or reach out, only to be met with outrage or indifference, is truly heartbreaking. It’s a reflection of their unwillingness to see you as a human being with pain, needs, and boundaries.
You are not wrong for standing up for yourself. You are not wrong for reaching out, seeking validation, or wanting someone to care. And it’s absolutely okay to feel hurt and angry by their lack of response or compassion. It’s a massive failure on their part, not yours.
Is there anyone outside of their circle you can turn to for support? Sometimes, just having one person validate your experience can make a world of difference. You deserve to be seen, heard, and protected, no matter what anyone else says.
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