Before diving into the emotional side, many people feel calmer when the essentials are handled:
- Legal documents → will, advance directive, funeral/cremation wishes.
- Finances → clear notes on bank accounts, debts, pensions, insurances, so survivors aren’t left confused.
- Practical guide → passwords, contacts, instructions for household matters (pets, property, subscriptions).
- End-of-life plan → specify whether you want ashes returned home or scattered, type of ceremony (if any).
đź’Ś Letters & Legacy Writing
Many who choose assisted death find comfort in writing letters that carry their love forward. These don’t have to be long; even short blessings or memories can be deeply healing.
- For family & close friends
- Share gratitude: “Thank you for the way you shaped my life.”
- Affirm their worth: “Please carry forward joy and kindness—those are the things I loved most about you.”
- Give permission: “Don’t be weighed down with guilt. My choice was deliberate, peaceful, and right for me.”
- For children or grandchildren
- Include life lessons or stories.
- Remind them they are loved unconditionally.
- Write something they can revisit at milestones (birthdays, weddings, graduations).
- For wider circle
- A farewell note or email that explains your decision calmly, emphasizing dignity and peace.
✨ Tip: Some people prepare letters to be opened at future times (e.g., when a grandchild turns 18). This extends your presence beyond your physical life.
🗣️ Last Conversations
If you feel able, talking openly is often more healing than silence.
- Keep it simple: “I want you to know this was my choice, and it brings me peace.”
- Focus on connection: rather than explaining the “why” in detail, you can highlight love, shared memories, and reassurance.
- Invite them to share: give space for your loved one’s emotions; sometimes they need permission to express sadness without feeling they’re burdening you.
🌌 Symbolic or Spiritual Acts
- Memory objects: gift jewelry, books, photos, or something personal for loved ones to keep.
- Recording messages: some leave voice notes or short videos—more personal than letters.
- Rituals: light a candle together, listen to favorite music, plant something in a garden. These small acts often become treasured final memories.
🕊️ Emotional Self-Care
It’s normal to feel waves of peace, doubt, sadness, or even guilt in these final weeks. Writing, meditating, or speaking with someone who can hold space (therapist, spiritual guide, close friend) helps you settle into your decision with clarity and love.
