By Linda C J Turner, Therapist & Advocate

It’s a question that rattles around in your brain long after the shock wears off.

After 32 years of marriage — the highs, the lows, the children, the sacrifices — you find yourself suddenly on the outside of someone’s new story. One you never even knew was being written. A story that begins with a cruel and casual phrase: “I have a girlfriend.”

But here’s the kicker — maybe there wasn’t a girlfriend at all. Maybe it was just a story. A weapon. A power play.

So why say it?

Because for some people, it’s never about truth. It’s about control.

They know exactly how to hurt you. How to flip your world upside down with just a few words. They need to win — even when there’s nothing left to win. They need to be seen as desirable, in-demand, moving on while you’re still catching your breath from the chaos they created.

It’s not about the girlfriend. It’s about the performance.

This kind of behavior is more common than we like to admit, especially in emotionally manipulative relationships. The goal isn’t love — it’s narrative control. It’s rewriting the ending to paint themselves as the victim, the hero, or the one who escaped.

But here’s what I’ve learned through the ashes of all of it:

• Let them have their version.
• Let them perform.
• Let them tell their story.

Because the truth has a quiet, steady way of revealing itself. And eventually, people see through the smoke and mirrors.

As for you? You already lived the truth. You showed up. You stayed loyal. You gave your love, your years, your heart.

And now? Now it’s your turn to reclaim your story.

Because you are not a footnote in someone else’s drama. You are the author of your own next chapter.

— Linda C J Turner

Trauma Therapist | Neuroscience & Emotional Intelligence Practitioner | Advocate for Women’s Empowerment