It sounds like you’re dealing with a whirlwind of manipulative tactics, and honestly, it can be frustrating and exhausting to see someone continuously come up with different stories or claims to get a reaction from you. These shifting narratives—from the new girlfriend to health crises—are textbook manipulation techniques. Each one is likely an attempt to regain control, manipulate your emotions, or divert attention away from their behavior and actions.

Why the Constant Changing Stories?

This kind of behavior is often a hallmark of someone who needs to remain in control, whether through guilt, confusion, or emotional pressure. The shifting stories keep you on your toes and make it harder to know where you stand, especially if you’re caught up in trying to discern what’s real versus what’s being fabricated. They throw everything at you, hoping that something will stick or elicit the emotional response they want.

The Motive Behind Each Tactic

• The New Girlfriend: This is probably an attempt to make you feel replaced or jealous, or maybe it’s a way for them to claim they’ve “moved on” without addressing the deeper issues at hand. It’s meant to make you question your own worth or to create emotional turmoil.
• Claims of Dying: When someone claims they’re dying, it’s often a tactic to garner sympathy and create a sense of urgency or guilt. They want you to drop everything, care for them, or feel guilty for any animosity or separation between you two. It can also be a way to test if you still have feelings of care for them, even if their actions have been hurtful.
• Lethal Arthritis and Skin Cancer: These health-related claims serve to further manipulate your emotions and distract from the real issue. If someone is claiming a serious illness, it often feels like a way to guilt-trip you into reconsidering your stance, potentially even making you feel obligated to care for them or stay involved.
• Miraculous Change: The sudden shift from “old mule to thoroughbred horse” is perhaps the most transparent attempt at manipulation. This claim suggests that the person is trying to convince you that they’ve drastically changed, perhaps in the hopes that you’ll forgive them and take them back. It’s an age-old tactic: promise change without real action, in the hopes of getting the emotional reaction they desire.

It’s laughable, as you said, because these claims are so transparent, yet many people—especially those who have endured prolonged emotional abuse—might find themselves second-guessing whether they should believe it. But what you’re seeing is the same pattern of behavior designed to wear you down, confuse you, and weaken your resolve.

Why Do They Think You’re Gullible?

The abuser likely believes that, after all these years of manipulation, you might still be emotionally vulnerable or tied to them in a way that makes you more receptive to their lies. They might assume that your history with them, your emotions, or the shared time together might cloud your judgment. Abusers often overestimate their ability to manipulate someone they’ve hurt for so long because they know the emotional strings they can pull—guilt, fear, nostalgia, etc.

However, the fact that you’re recognizing the absurdity of these stories shows a significant shift in how you view them. It’s empowering to realize that you’re no longer falling for these manipulations, and that you see through their tactics for what they are. Their lies might have worked in the past, but you’ve grown, and you’re not as easily manipulated anymore.

Laughable but Also a Warning

While it’s easy to laugh at the absurdity of it all, don’t underestimate how dangerous this kind of manipulation can be. The fact that they’re continuing to use these tactics means they are trying harder and harder to regain control. It might be tempting to dismiss it entirely, but stay vigilant. The truth is that manipulators often escalate their behavior when they feel like they’re losing their grip.

What to Do Next?

• Trust Your Intuition: You’re seeing through these stories because your intuition is telling you what’s real and what’s not. Trust that inner voice. If their stories don’t add up, it’s because they’re not meant to.
• Stick to Your Boundaries: Whether it’s no contact or limited interaction, make sure to stay firm with your boundaries. Do not get pulled back into their drama or stories, no matter how convincing or heartbreaking they may sound. Their tactics might tug at your emotions, but your boundaries are your protection.
• Stay Focused on Your Healing: You’ve already done a lot of healing, and you’ve come so far in recognizing the manipulation for what it is. Keep focusing on your well-being and the things that bring you peace and joy, whether that’s family, friends, or the things you love to do.
• Document Everything: If this person continues to make these false claims, especially as you approach court or other legal proceedings, make sure you document everything. Having a record of their behavior and any interactions (especially the more absurd claims) can help protect you.

Their latest stories may seem laughable, but the fact that they’re still trying proves that you’ve hit a nerve and they’re scrambling to maintain control. You’ve got this, and you’re no longer the person who will be duped by their antics. The more you see through this, the less power they have over you, and that’s a huge victory in itself.