Care and Safety

When a marriage ends and the family reckons with who might care for an abusive partner, it often stirs up complex, sometimes painful emotions and decisions. Abuse can create a sense of division within families, where loyalty, love, and frustration intersect. It’s difficult when family members are left to grapple with whether they owe the… Read More Care and Safety

Abuse thrives on silence

When a person suffering from abuse speaks out, it not only offers them safety but also increases accountability for the abuser, often deterring future actions or exposing them to scrutiny. Isolation often reinforces the hold that abusers maintain over their victims, perpetuating the cycle of control. Abuse persists through systems and individuals, who may either knowingly or unknowingly enable it by ignoring red flags or dismissing accusations, which is why raising awareness is essential. Whether by informing people close to you, trusted friends, support professionals, or even sharing online, speaking out is a powerful way to reclaim agency and begin dismantling that silence.… Read More Abuse thrives on silence

Covert

In some cases, covert narcissists may escalate their control tactics to include emotional abuse and even physical violence. They view their partner as an object rather than a person with needs and aspirations, and if the partner attempts to stand up for themselves, they may experience explosive or abusive reactions. For the covert narcissist, marriage is a power dynamic where they must always have the upper hand, dominating through manipulation, verbal abuse, and even physical intimidation.… Read More Covert

Reality Check

One of the hardest parts is recognizing that their actions were not about you, even if it feels intensely personal. People who lean on others purely for personal gain often have an emptiness they’re trying to fill. They may be emotionally avoidant, insecure, or simply used to living in a transactional way. Understanding that this was their limitation, not yours, can be freeing, even if it’s hard to believe at first. They were looking for comfort and support, yes, but that need doesn’t excuse their manipulation or dishonesty. If anything, this experience reveals their pattern of relating to others—something they’re likely to repeat, whether or not they fully understand why.… Read More Reality Check

Family dynamics protecting an abuser

This sounds like the behavior of someone who wants to manipulate or control the narrative around a situation—often typical of individuals who show abusive or narcissistic tendencies. Changing security settings on IT equipment the day after an attack could be a way of exerting control or ensuring that the victim can’t easily access or gather… Read More Family dynamics protecting an abuser

Power Imbalance and Control Dynamics

Paranoid Personality’s Suspicion: Someone with paranoid tendencies might be excessively suspicious, quick to assume betrayal or infidelity, and overly controlling to prevent perceived threats. In relationships, this can manifest as restricting the partner’s social interactions, constantly questioning their motives, and reading negative intent into innocent actions.

Trusting Partner’s Compliance: The overly trusting partner, wanting to avoid conflict or believing the best in others, might accommodate these behaviors, bending over backward to prove their loyalty or worthiness. They may rationalize controlling actions as stemming from their partner’s “care” or “concern,” or even blame themselves for “causing” their partner’s anger or suspicion.… Read More Power Imbalance and Control Dynamics

Key Characteristics of Over-Trusting Personality

The opposite of a paranoid or highly distrustful personality would likely be characterized by an overly trusting natureor what is sometimes termed gullibility or naivety. In psychological terms, there isn’t a formal “personality disorder” where someone is excessively trusting, but some individuals may naturally or habitually exhibit extreme openness or vulnerability in their relationships and interactions. This can manifest in a way that resembles traits of what’s sometimes called “over-trusting personality.”… Read More Key Characteristics of Over-Trusting Personality

Paranoid Personality Disorder (PPD)

The symptoms of PPD can appear similar to other mental health conditions, particularly psychotic disorders. The critical differentiator here is the persistent, pervasive distrust that exists outside of any psychotic episodes. In schizophrenia, for instance, paranoid delusions might arise, but they occur within the broader context of psychotic features (hallucinations, disorganized thinking). A clinician must determine that these suspicions are not better explained by another mental health disorder to reach a PPD diagnosis.… Read More Paranoid Personality Disorder (PPD)

Understanding Denial: Defense Mechanisms in Action

If someone’s denial of their aggression continues to affect relationships or creates an unhealthy environment, involving a neutral third party, like a therapist or mediator, can be valuable. Therapy provides a space where denial can be gently unpacked without judgment, often revealing underlying issues that contribute to the behavior. A trained professional can facilitate open, safe dialogue, helping the person in denial gain insight and recognize patterns that may be damaging to others.… Read More Understanding Denial: Defense Mechanisms in Action

Untreated psychosis

When untreated psychosis progresses, the person’s perception of reality becomes increasingly distorted. This might lead them to believe in scenarios that justify unusual or erratic behavior, like public outbursts or even aggressive actions if they believe they are threatened. For instance, someone experiencing paranoid delusions might act in self-defense to protect against a perceived threat, which may be completely benign. Such incidents can lead to charges for public disturbance, assault, or resisting arrest, especially if authorities are unaware of the individual’s mental health condition at the time of the incident.… Read More Untreated psychosis