A Neuroscience Perspective on Awareness, Denial, and Accountability Many people only recognise the seriousness of abuse when it affects someone close to them. But by then, the damage is already done. Awareness, honesty, and accountability must come sooner—not later. Because ignoring abuse does not make it disappear—it allows it to continue. The Brain Prefers Comfort… Read More Why We Ignore Abuse—Until It’s Too Late
Abuse does not exist in isolation. When someone moves through life harming partners, ex-wives, children, or others, and that behaviour is ignored, excused, or covered up, it creates the conditions for abuse to continue. This is the uncomfortable truth: abuse is not sustained by one person alone. It is sustained by the environment around them.… Read More Why Abuse Continues: The Role of Silence, Denial, and Protection
When someone goes through life abusing partners, ex-wives, children, or others, and people continue to cover for them, excuse them, or stay silent—this is how abuse is allowed to continue. Abuse does not exist in isolation. It is sustained by silence, denial, and the willingness of others to look the other way. When behaviour is… Read More Silence protects the wrong person.
When it comes to money, some people will protect an abuser regardless of the truth. Financial interests, shared assets, or fear of loss can sometimes outweigh morality, fairness, or even basic human empathy. In these situations, denial becomes easier than accountability. People may choose to ignore harm, minimise abuse, or silence concerns in order to… Read More When Money Talks
People who cover up or protect abusive behaviour are not protecting anyone—they are enabling harm. Whether it comes from denial, loyalty, fear, or self-interest, the effect is the same: abuse gets minimised, truth gets distorted, and victims are left without protection or credibility. You cannot claim to support safety while ignoring or excusing harmful behaviour.… Read More Enabling Harm
People who cover up or protect abusive behaviour often do so for a variety of reasons, including denial, loyalty, fear, or a lack of understanding of what abuse actually looks like. In many cases, they may not recognise the seriousness of the situation, or they may prioritise maintaining relationships or avoiding conflict over acknowledging harm.… Read More Protecting Abusers
Estimado/a [Nombre / Organizador del evento]: Me dirijo a usted en relación con comunicaciones previas sobre mi asistencia a [nombre del evento]. Por la presente, le informo formalmente de que existe una orden de alejamiento en vigor contra [nombre de la persona], dictada por un juzgado español. De acuerdo con la legislación española, en particular los artículos… Read More Outline Letter
Here is a clear, practical explanation of your legal rights in Spain when you have a restraining order (“orden de alejamiento”), especially in situations like public events: ⚖️ Your Legal Position (Spain) If you have a restraining order against someone: 👉 You are the protected person👉 They are the restricted person This is fundamental. 🚫 What the other person… Read More ⚖️ Your Legal Position (Spain)
If you have a restraining order (“orden de alejamiento”) against your ex, the responsibility is on him to stay away from you—not the other way around. ⚖️ What the law in Spain says A restraining order means: 👉 If he attends an event knowing you will be there, he is at risk of breaching the order. 🚫 Being prevented from attending… Read More You should not be the one excluded or prevented from attending.
Here’s how it works in simple terms: 🚨 If a restraining order is breached A restraining order (“orden de alejamiento”) is a legal protection, not a suggestion. If the person: 👉 This is a criminal offence in Spain. Even being in the same public place knowingly can count as a breach. 👮♂️ What happens in public places? If people around ignore… Read More Guardia Civil can and should get involved if a restraining order is being ignored, especially in a public place.
Linda C J Turner | Trauma Therapist & Emotional Healing Specialist 