Every now and then, someone proudly announces, “I was a bit of a player in my younger days.” The question is: Is it a confession, or is it a warning label? People absolutely can change. Human brains are capable of forming new habits, developing empathy and building healthy relationships throughout life. Genuine change happens when someone… Read More “I Used to Be a Player…” – Should You Be Worried?
We’ve all heard the phrase, “They’re just a player.” But what does that actually mean? A player isn’t simply someone who dates a lot. A player is someone who enjoys the pursuit, the attention and the emotional power that comes from making another person invest in them—often with little intention of building a genuine relationship. They know… Read More Players: Why Do They Love Bomb and Give False Hope?
Remember when meeting someone meant bumping into them in a café or being introduced by a friend? Now it starts with a profile that reads: “6’4″, Michelin-star chef, part-time brain surgeon, RAF pilot, property developer, model, philanthropist and dog whisperer.” Really? If dating apps reflected real life, every hospital in the country would have closed… Read More Welcome to Online Dating… Where Everyone Is Apparently a Brain Surgeon
People who play mind games in relationships are often trying to meet their own emotional needs in unhealthy ways. While every person is different, psychology suggests several common motivations. They Want Control For some people, making others feel uncertain gives them a sense of power. If they can keep someone guessing, chasing approval, or seeking… Read More Players and mind games
🌱 The Life You Imagined Might Be Gone — But the Life You’re Building Can Still Be Beautiful View • 🫀 Learning to Trust Safe Love View • 💞 Is This Love? View • 🌟 Proud to Be Seen View • 💔 “There Was Nothing Subtle About It” View • 🕊️ The Mask of Chronic Liars: When Truth Becomes the Threat View •
Some people dream of finding true love. Others dream of finding someone with a detached house, healthy pension, paid-off car, inheritance on the horizon and absolutely no understanding of financial boundaries. It’s a different kind of soulmate. Their personal motto? “If it’s going for free, I’ll have two.” Someone offers to pay?“How generous!” Someone offers… Read More Hope the Next One Has Deep Pockets
House? “Into the pot.” Car? “Into the pot.” Inheritance? “Into the pot.” Pension? “Into the pot.” Thirty years of hard work? “Excellent, we’ll take that too.” Then, when there’s nothing left to extract, they suddenly discover they’re “unhappy” and start shopping for the next generous human being with a pulse and a savings account. From… Read More Some people would sell their soul to the devil… but only after asking for a better offer.
There is a significant difference between building a life together and slowly watching your independence disappear. Healthy relationships involve shared decisions, mutual respect and a willingness to contribute according to each person’s circumstances. Financial abuse, however, is about control. It is about one person gradually acquiring access to the other’s assets, income and future security… Read More More Than Red Flags: When Love Becomes a Financial Transaction
“He could never have done those things. He’s such a nice man.” These are some of the most painful words survivors of coercive control and emotional abuse hear. Friends, family and neighbours often judge a person by the version they see: charming, funny, generous and helpful. Meanwhile, behind closed doors, another reality exists—one known only… Read More The Hidden Confession: When Private Regret and Public Image Don’t Match
History and everyday life are full of people who appeared charming, generous and respectable while privately causing harm. Psychologists sometimes refer to this as impression management—carefully controlling how others see you while behaving very differently behind closed doors. Fake kindness is not simply being polite. It is kindness with an agenda: to gain admiration, control, power… Read More Fake Kindness: When Goodness Is a Performance
Linda C J Turner | Trauma Therapist & Emotional Healing Specialist 