Let’s get one thing very clear.

Illness — physical or mental — does NOT excuse abuse.
Cancer does not excuse abuse.
Grief does not excuse abuse.
Stress does not excuse abuse.
Trauma does not excuse abuse.
A “bad time” does not excuse abuse.

Abuse is not a symptom.
It is not a coping mechanism.
It is not caused by pain, loss, or diagnosis.

Abuse is a behavioural choice rooted in entitlement, control, and lack of accountability.

Psychology is clear on this:
Millions of people experience illness, grief, depression, anxiety, and trauma —
and do not abuse others.

If someone becomes cruel, controlling, violent, or demeaning during hardship,
the hardship did not cause the abuse —
it revealed it.

Stop asking victims to be more understanding.
Stop asking them to tolerate harm because someone is “going through something.”
Empathy is not self-erasure.

You can have compassion without accepting abuse.
You can acknowledge suffering without excusing harm.

Abuse is abuse —
no footnotes, no caveats, no justifications.

— Linda

🔴 If this makes you uncomfortable, ask yourself why.