Here’s a practical, survivor-centered shortlist you can use as a “map” for safer relocation. I’ve organized it by how hard it is for an abuser with a criminal record to get in plus how strong the everyday protections are once you’re there. It’s written for someone starting in Spain and wanting real distance, legal safety, and a fresh start.
Safest picks if your abuser has a criminal record
These countries have strict entry screening (criminal records can block visas) and strong protections for survivors:
- United States
- Why it’s safer: Tough entry checks; many convictions bar or complicate entry.
- On-the-ground protection: Protective orders, shelter networks, victim compensation programs in many states.
- Good for: Creating a large ocean + legal barrier so he can’t “just show up.”
- Canada
- Why it’s safer: Very strict on criminality (even DUIs can be an issue).
- On-the-ground protection: Strong survivor services and legal supports; high-standard policing responses.
- Good for: Safety + high social support, calmer pace than large US cities if you want that.
- Australia
- Why it’s safer: Criminal history and “character” tests can block entry.
- On-the-ground protection: Robust domestic violence laws, intervention orders, active shelter networks.
- Good for: Distance, beachside calm, English-speaking services.
- New Zealand
- Why it’s safer: Character/conviction checks; small population makes “disappearing” into a peaceful life easier.
- On-the-ground protection: Clear protection order system, strong community supports.
- Good for: A quieter reset with tight community care.
Strong alternatives with excellent protections (but easier entry for EU/UK travelers)
These offer very good survivor protections and supportive systems; entry may be easier for many travelers, so pair this with a personal safety plan.
- United Kingdom
- Why it’s safer: Strong criminal justice response to domestic abuse; active support charities.
- Note: If your abuser is EU/UK and visa-free, focus on confidential addresses, phone/ID changes, and relocation secrecy.
- Nordic countries (Sweden, Norway, Denmark, Finland, Iceland)
- Why it’s safer: Very strong social systems, survivor-centered services, high trust in policing.
- Vibe: Low-drama, high-structure societies—great for nervous systems needing calm.
- Netherlands / Germany
- Why it’s safer: Strong protections, shelters, and victim supports; predictable systems.
- Vibe: Organized, practical environments where rebuilding is methodical.
- Portugal / Spain (smaller city reset)
- Why it’s safer: Familiar for you; strong community and growing survivor supports.
- Tip: Choose a new region with clean boundaries, use a confidential address service, and change daily patterns.
How to choose—fast decision filters
Use these to pick within a week:
- Maximum legal barrier to him entering? → USA, Canada, Australia, New Zealand.
- Fastest “nervous system calm”? → New Zealand, Canada (smaller cities), Nordic countries, coastal Australia.
- Most affordable soft landing from Spain? → Portugal (Douro/Alentejo), Spain (new region), parts of Canada (Atlantic provinces), smaller US cities.
- Easiest with English everywhere? → USA, Canada, Australia, New Zealand, UK, Ireland.
Practical safety extras (wherever you go)
- Information hygiene: New phone number/email, no forwarding of mail, scrub social profiles, lock down friend lists, ask contacts not to tag your location.
- Address confidentiality: Use PO boxes/virtual mailboxes and landlord privacy options where available.
- Paper trail reset: New bank at destination, new SIM, separate devices and passwords, 2FA on everything.
- Travel quietly: One-way ticket + flexible routing; avoid predictable patterns and public posts until you’ve settled.
- Legal prep: Keep digital copies of key documents (IDs, medical, police reports, restraining orders) in an encrypted cloud folder.
My top three “profiles” (to make deciding simpler)
- “I want the biggest legal wall between us.” → Canada or USA.
- “I want distance plus a gentler pace.” → New Zealand or smaller-city Australia (e.g., Sunshine Coast, Hobart).
- “I want familiarity and affordability while I regroup.” → Portugal or a new Spanish region (smaller coastal town), with strict confidentiality steps.
