Economic abuse

Threats of financial ruin are a common tactic used by abusive partners to exert control and keep someone trapped in a toxic relationship. This is a form of economic abuse and is designed to make you feel powerless. However, there are ways to protect yourself and regain control of your life. Here’s what you can do:

1. Recognize the Abuse

Understand the Tactics: Threats of financial ruin are manipulative and aimed at intimidating you. This behavior is not your fault, and you have options to break free.
Acknowledge Your Worth: No amount of financial security justifies staying in an abusive relationship. Your emotional and physical well-being is more important.

2. Build Financial Independence

Secure Your Own Funds: Open a personal bank account if you don’t already have one. Start saving small amounts of money if possible.
Gather Important Documents: Collect key items such as:
- Bank statements.
- Proof of joint assets.
- Tax returns.
- Employment records.
- Marriage or cohabitation agreements.
Explore Employment Options: If you are not currently working, consider opportunities to generate income or develop skills for future independence.

3. Seek Legal Advice

Consult a Lawyer: An attorney can help you understand your rights regarding joint assets, property, and financial entitlements. Depending on your jurisdiction, you may be entitled to:
- A share of marital assets.
- Spousal support (alimony).
- Child support if you have children.
Protect Shared Assets: Your lawyer can guide you on how to prevent your partner from depleting joint accounts or hiding assets.

4. Document the Abuse

Keep Records: Write down incidents of financial and emotional abuse, including threats of financial ruin. If possible, save texts, emails, or voicemails where such threats are made. This documentation can be helpful in legal proceedings.

5. Create a Safety Plan

Plan Your Exit: Work with a trusted friend, family member, or domestic violence advocate to plan a safe way to leave.
Emergency Resources: Research shelters or organizations that can provide temporary financial and housing assistance.
Protect Your Digital Footprint: Ensure your partner cannot access your emails, banking information, or social media accounts.

6. Access Community Resources

Domestic Violence Shelters: Many offer financial assistance, legal advice, and counseling.
Nonprofit Organizations: Some groups specialize in helping survivors of financial abuse rebuild their independence.
Hotlines: Contact a domestic violence hotline for guidance and support tailored to your situation.

7. Prioritize Your Well-Being

Therapeutic Support: Speak with a counselor or therapist to navigate the emotional challenges of leaving.
Believe in Yourself: Financial threats are designed to make you feel dependent, but with the right support, you can rebuild your life.

Remember:

Financial abuse is a form of control, but you are not powerless.
There are legal protections and resources available to help you leave safely and start fresh.