Narcissists don’t engage in altruistic acts or giving back out of genuine kindness or the joy of helping others. Recent research reveals that their gifts are more like investments tailored to serve their own desires, not to please others. According to a study by Hyun, Park, and Park (2016), when comparing individuals with high self-esteem to those with high narcissistic traits, it was found that narcissists give gifts strategically to maintain control and allegiance within relationships.

Their gifts aren’t tokens of appreciation; rather, they’re tools to ensure the recipient remains devoted to them. These gifts are designed to uphold the narcissist’s dominance and influence in the relationship.

When a narcissist presents expensive or valuable gifts, it’s not because they think highly of the recipient. It’s a calculated move to maintain the recipient’s admiration towards them.

Ordinarily, gestures like giving thoughtful presents or indulging in special occasions come from a place of genuine affection, not to create obligations or enforce obedience. However, for narcissists, their giving is driven by fear and the need to perpetuate their game.

While philanthropists are encouraged to give generously, narcissists give out of a different motivation—it’s not about giving until it hurts, but rather giving because it hurts. Their fear of losing admiration drives them to maintain a facade of generosity to sustain their audience’s admiration.

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