Trauma refers to an emotional or psychological response to an event or series of events that are distressing or disturbing, often exceeding an individual’s ability to cope. Traumatic experiences can be diverse and may include situations such as accidents, natural disasters, physical or sexual assault, combat, or the sudden loss of a loved one. Trauma can have a profound impact on an individual’s mental, emotional, and physical well-being, leading to a range of symptoms and challenges.
Abuse doesn’t take a holiday — in fact, it often intensifies during holidays like Christmas or birthdays. Many victims think that leaving home, going on a trip, or being away from daily stress might protect them, but abuse thrives in isolation. Abusers exploit distance from friends, family, and familiar environments to gain control. After 32 Christmases of living… Read More Abuse and the Holidays: Why Vigilance Matters
Abuse doesn’t take a holiday — in fact, it often intensifies during holidays like Christmas or birthdays. Many victims think that leaving home, going on a trip, or being away from daily stress might protect them, but abuse thrives in isolation. Abusers exploit distance from friends, family, and familiar environments to gain control. After 32 Christmases of living… Read More Abuse doesn’t take a holiday
I’ve lived through 32 Christmases in an abusive household. I’ve seen firsthand how the season, which so many people associate with warmth and joy, can actually bring one of the most dangerous times of the year for someone living under the control of an abuser. Abuse doesn’t wait for a calendar. But at Christmas, abusers often up… Read More Surviving Christmas in an Abusive Home
When someone constantly complains they are sick, old, tired, struggling, vulnerable…and then suddenly they’re off on holiday alone, full of energy, that behaviour is not random. It’s a pattern — and it signals something very specific. Let’s break it down clearly. 🚨 1. This Is a Manipulation Pattern Called “Strategic Vulnerability” Predatory or opportunistic people often perform weakness when they want something… Read More “Strategic Vulnerability”
2. Economic abuse and predatory financial service use 3. Vulnerability to financial exploitation 4. Romance fraud / relationship-based financial exploitation 🔍 Gaps & Considerations 🧾 Summary these patterns you do align very strongly with recorded research on financial/relationship-exploitation. These key points emerge:
IntroductionSurvivors of long-term abuse often experience a profound psychological weight. Decades of emotional, physical, or relational trauma can shape not only beliefs and behaviors but also neural architecture. Emerging from such a context into a space of autonomy—symbolized here by “having no ring on your finger”—can trigger complex emotional, cognitive, and neurobiological responses. Psychological Perspective… Read More Freedom After Decades of Abuse: The Neuroscience of Choice and Self-Determination
Most people assume that secure attachment protects someone from ending up in an unhealthy relationship. And in many cases, it does. But the truth is more complex: Secure people are sometimes MORE vulnerable to getting trapped —precisely because of their strengths. A securely attached person expects honesty, repair, and emotional reciprocity.When they meet someone who is… Read More How Secure People Get Trapped with Insecure or Abusive Partners
1. Trauma Rewires the Brain Result: Survivors may feel anxious or mistrustful even in genuinely safe situations. This explains why instinctive judgement about what is “right” or “healthy” in relationships can be impaired. 2. Confusing Safety with Danger 3. Neuroplasticity and Healing Key point: Cognitive understanding (“I know this is safe”) is insufficient; the nervous system must physically… Read More Neuroscience and Psychology of Re-Learning Healthy Relationships After Abuse
1. Cognitive Dissonance 2. Stereotypes of Abusers 3. Victim-Blaming Bias 4. Subtlety and Hidden Nature of Abuse 5. Compartmentalization and Masking 6. Gradual Escalation 7. Information Control and Isolation Summary Victims of hidden abuse are often doubted because:
1. The “Mask of Normalcy” This is sometimes called “the façade of normalcy”, which conceals abusive behaviours behind closed doors. 2. Why People Don’t Believe It 3. Psychological Tactics That Hide Abuse 4. Neuroscience and Behavioural Explanation 5. Implications Summary Many perpetrators appear normal, competent, and likable externally while engaging in severe abuse in private. Cognitive… Read More The Hidden Nature of Perpetrators
