When someone enjoys cruelty toward someone they supposedly love, it reveals a deeply troubling lack of empathy, a manipulative mindset, and a toxic character. Their actions, such as offering a fraction of what you’re legally entitled to or forcing you to buy back your own car, highlight a calculated effort to demean, control, and take advantage of you. Here’s what such behavior says about them—and how you can protect yourself.
What This Behavior Says About Them
- A Cruel and Manipulative Nature
- Delighting in another person’s suffering—especially someone they claim to love—shows a lack of emotional maturity and empathy.
- Manipulative individuals often use cruelty as a way to exert power, knowing it will cause harm and stress.
- A Sense of Entitlement
- Offering only 10% of joint property or forcing you to buy your own car back demonstrates entitlement and greed.
- This suggests they see you as someone to exploit, not an equal partner.
- A Double Standard
- Forcing you to endure things they would never tolerate themselves highlights hypocrisy and a lack of fairness.
- It shows they place themselves above you, unwilling to recognize your equal rights or value.
- Potential Financial Abuse
- Selling your car, spending the money, and leaving you to repurchase it are textbook examples of financial abuse.
- This behavior is meant to strip you of independence and leave you in a weaker position.
- A Pattern of Control
- These actions are not isolated; they are likely part of a broader pattern of controlling behavior.
- They aim to destabilize you emotionally and financially, leaving you dependent and vulnerable.
What This Behavior Says About the Relationship
- There Is No Genuine Love
- Love is built on respect, kindness, and mutual care. Someone who enjoys your suffering does not truly love you.
- Their actions are a betrayal of the trust and commitment that a marriage is supposed to embody.
- Power Dynamics Are Skewed
- They are using cruelty and financial manipulation to tilt the scales of power in their favor.
- This is not a partnership but a one-sided relationship where they benefit at your expense.
- They Are Trying to Weaken You
- By denying you your legal rights and making you fight for what you’re entitled to, they are attempting to wear you down emotionally and financially.
- This tactic is often used to force an unfair settlement.
How to Protect Yourself
- Know Your Rights
- Consult with a lawyer immediately to ensure you receive the 50% of joint property you are legally entitled to.
- If financial abuse is involved, bring this to the attention of your legal team; it may strengthen your case.
- Document Everything
- Keep records of every instance of manipulation, cruelty, or financial deceit.
- Save emails, texts, or any documentation of their attempts to deny your legal rights.
- Stand Firm
- Do not settle for less than you are entitled to, no matter how much pressure they apply.
- Insist on fair treatment, even if it means going through a lengthy legal battle.
- Seek Emotional Support
- Lean on friends, family, or a therapist to help you process the emotional toll of their behavior.
- Join support groups for individuals experiencing financial or emotional abuse in relationships.
- Secure Your Independence
- Open a bank account in your name if you haven’t already.
- Begin planning for your financial future, focusing on regaining control of your resources.
Final Thoughts
Someone who enjoys cruelty and actively works to undermine you after claiming to love you is showing their true character—one rooted in selfishness, manipulation, and control. Their actions are not a reflection of your worth but a testament to their own failings.
You deserve respect, fairness, and freedom, and while their cruelty may have caused significant harm, it also provides clarity: this person does not deserve a place in your future. Stand firm, demand your rights, and rebuild a life free from their toxic influence. You are stronger than they realize.
