đź’Ž Psychology of High Standards
- Boundaries protect your value: When you know what you deserve, you naturally filter out people who can’t or won’t give it.
- Self-worth attracts respect: People unconsciously mirror how you treat yourself. If you treat yourself like you deserve the best, others are more likely to treat you that way too.
- Settling erodes confidence: Lowering your standards to “fit” someone’s level signals to your own brain that your needs aren’t important — which can lead to self-doubt, anxiety, and resentment.
đź§ Neuroscience of Self-Worth
- Dopamine (motivation/reward) increases when you maintain high standards and see them met. This makes love feel exciting but also safe.
- Oxytocin (bonding hormone) flows more easily in relationships where you feel genuinely cared for, not where you’re chasing crumbs.
- Cortisol (stress hormone) rises when you settle for less, because deep down your brain registers that something feels “off.”
🔑 Takeaway
You’re not being “too much” — you’re protecting your nervous system and your future happiness.
High standards aren’t about being picky or entitled; they’re about being aligned with your own worth.
