Here’s a structured list of the main types of emotional/psychological abuse commonly reported in domestic violence (DV) cases. These forms often overlap, and survivors typically experience several at once:
🔴 Control & Domination
- Constant monitoring of movements, phone, or social media.
- Isolating from friends, family, or support networks.
- Making all decisions (what to wear, eat, who to see).
- Treating partner like a child, servant, or possession.
🟠 Verbal & Psychological Attacks
- Yelling, screaming, swearing.
- Name-calling, insults, humiliation.
- Mocking appearance, intelligence, or background.
- Gaslighting (denying events, twisting reality).
🟡 Threats & Intimidation
- Threatening harm to partner, children, pets, or self-harm (“If you leave, I’ll kill myself”).
- Destroying property as a warning (punching walls, smashing objects).
- Stalking, following, or showing up unexpectedly.
- Threats around custody, deportation, or financial ruin.
🟢 Emotional Neglect & Withholding
- Silent treatment; withdrawing affection to punish.
- Refusing communication or intimacy.
- Ignoring needs, dismissing feelings.
- Stonewalling during conflicts.
🔵 Manipulation & Coercion
- Blaming the victim for the abuse (“You made me do this”).
- Playing the victim to gain sympathy.
- Using guilt, shame, or religion/culture to control.
- Love-bombing and devaluation cycles.
🟣 Undermining Self-Worth
- Constant criticism and comparison to others.
- Undermining achievements or sabotaging success.
- Public humiliation or ridicule.
- Telling partner they are “crazy,” “worthless,” or “unlovable.”
⚫ Exploiting Vulnerabilities
- Using past trauma or secrets against the victim.
- Exploiting immigration status, disability, or health conditions.
- Controlling medication or access to healthcare.
- Manipulating children to turn against the other parent.
⚠️ Key Research Finding:
Emotional abuse is reported in nearly all DV cases, even when physical violence is absent. Survivors often say the psychological harm (fear, shame, erosion of identity) lasts longer than physical injuries.
