Post 3: “Just Forget It” — The Silencing of Survivor Stories
💬 “Why are you still bringing that up?”
💬 “That was ages ago. Just forget it.”
💬 “You always live in the past.”
🧊 Translation: “Your pain is inconvenient to me.”
🚩 What’s Really Happening?
This phrase may seem like an attempt to “move on,” but it’s actually a tactic of erasure.
When someone says this after emotional or physical abuse, what they’re really saying is:
- “I don’t want to be accountable.”
- “I care more about my comfort than your healing.”
- “I want to control the narrative.”
🧠 Psychological Tactic at Play: Minimization + Gaslighting
This phrase tells the survivor:
- Their trauma isn’t valid
- Their emotions are a burden
- Their healing process is wrong or unnecessary
Over time, you may start to:
- Feel guilt for even having emotions
- Suppress your story out of shame
- Believe that speaking up is what causes conflict
But the truth is:
👉 What happened caused the conflict. Speaking about it is how you heal.
🔁 Abuse Hurts Twice:
- When it happens.
- When you’re told to “forget it” instead of being supported in healing.
❤️🩹 For Survivors: You Have the Right to Speak
Talking about what happened is part of how your brain processes, files, and reintegrates traumatic memory.
Your voice is your power.
Your memories matter.
And healing doesn’t follow someone else’s timeline.
💡 Affirmation:
“I am not too much for naming what hurt me.
I have the right to remember, speak, and heal.
My pain deserves a place, not a punishment.”
