“Just try not to think about it”

Could be the worst advice you give to someone!

Avoidance is a common coping strategy that some people may use to deal with traumatic memories or distressing emotions. While it may provide temporary relief, avoiding thoughts and feelings related to a traumatic event can have detrimental effects on one’s well-being and hinder the healing process. Here’s why avoidance can exacerbate symptoms and make it harder to move forward:

Increased Intrusion: Paradoxically, attempting to avoid traumatic memories and emotions can lead to an increase in intrusive thoughts, flashbacks, and nightmares. The more one tries to suppress these experiences, the more they may resurface in unexpected and distressing ways.
Emotional Numbing: Avoiding emotions related to trauma can lead to emotional numbing, where a person may feel disconnected or unable to experience a wide range of emotions, including positive ones. This can impact personal relationships and overall life satisfaction.
Heightened Anxiety: Avoidance can lead to increased anxiety and hypervigilance as individuals try to prevent any triggers or reminders of the trauma. This heightened state of arousal can be exhausting and make it challenging to engage in daily activities.
Interference with Healing: Healing from trauma often involves processing and integrating the traumatic experiences. Avoidance prevents this essential processing, making it harder to come to terms with the event and find a sense of closure.
Isolation: Avoidance can lead to social withdrawal and isolation, as individuals may avoid situations or people that could potentially trigger distressing memories or emotions.
Maintaining Negative Beliefs: Avoidant coping can reinforce negative beliefs about oneself and the world. For example, a person might believe that they are weak for being unable to cope with their emotions, which can perpetuate feelings of shame and self-blame.

Instead of relying on avoidance as the primary coping mechanism, it is essential for individuals to seek healthier and more adaptive ways of processing trauma. This may include:

Seeking Professional Help: Working with a trained therapist experienced in trauma treatment can provide a safe and supportive environment to process and work through traumatic memories and emotions.
Mindfulness and Grounding Techniques: Practicing mindfulness can help individuals stay present and connected with their emotions, allowing them to process their feelings in a controlled manner.
Supportive Relationships: Sharing experiences with trusted friends, family, or support groups can provide validation and comfort during the healing process.
Gradual Exposure: Engaging in gradual exposure to trauma-related thoughts or situations under the guidance of a therapist can help desensitize emotional reactions and reduce avoidance behaviors.
Self-Compassion: Being gentle and compassionate with oneself is crucial in the healing process. Recognizing that trauma recovery takes time and that it’s okay to have difficult emotions is an important part of the journey.

By taking active steps to process and confront traumatic memories in a safe and supported way, individuals can gradually move towards healing and find greater resilience in moving on with their lives.

My therapy services are designed to help you manage symptoms of anxiety, depression, trauma, and other mental health concerns. I am trained in a variety of therapeutic modalities, including cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), psychodynamic therapy, and eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR). I work collaboratively with you to develop a personalized treatment plan that fits your unique needs and goals.