Deciding whether to warn your abuser’s new partner about past abuse, especially something as severe as strangulation, is a deeply personal and complex decision. It involves weighing your safety, emotional well-being, and the potential impact on the new partner. Here’s a comprehensive look at the considerations involved: Understanding the Risks Strangulation is one of the… Read More Warning
Strangulation is not just an act of violence — it is one of the clearest predictors of escalating abuse and potential homicide in domestic violence cases. Survivors often underestimate the seriousness of this form of assault, sometimes due to the absence of visible injuries. But make no mistake: strangulation is a form of power and… Read More Strangulation: When It’s Time to Leave — What Comes Next
“He never screamed at the waitress. Never slammed doors at work. Never called his friends names or insulted them in front of others.But behind closed doors? He was someone else.And I used to wonder… Is it me? Is it my fault? Does he have anger issues?No. The truth is harder to face, but also liberating:It wasn’t… Read More “If They Can Control It in Public, It’s Not a Loss of Control — It’s a Choice”
💔 “How Many Years Had I Been Lied To?” – When Betrayal Hides in Plain Sight “He preached honesty. He demanded truth. And all along, he was lying to me. From the beginning.For over thirty years, I lived in a web of deception—carefully spun, layer by layer, until I couldn’t see it anymore.” This isn’t just… Read More 🧠 The Psychology of the “Honest Liar”
“He made a deal with his ex-wife—she wouldn’t speak about the abuse, and in return, he’d keep paying her support. At the time, I thought it was just a messy divorce. Now, I know it was strategic. He was hiding the truth—and I was the next target.” In abusive dynamics, silence is power. For the… Read More The Silence Deal: When Abusers Bury Their Past Through Coercive Agreements
“People tried to warn me. My own daughter heard the rumours in our local village. Even I had a gut feeling something was off—but I ignored it. Why?” This question haunts many survivors after the end of an abusive relationship. When the truth is finally undeniable, we often turn inward, full of self-blame, asking: “How… Read More Why We Ignore Red Flags: The Psychology Behind Overriding Intuition
In the long aftermath of abuse, survivors often find themselves walking a tightrope between truth and silence. The urge to speak out, to expose the lies, to scream “This isn’t fair!” is real, raw, and valid. And yet, sometimes, the most powerful statement we can make is not saying a word. Imagine this: the abuser, once… Read More When Justice Speaks in Silence: The Power of Restraint in the Face of Deceit
There comes a moment in every survivor’s journey — whether it’s through divorce, inheritance battles, or financial abuse — when the mask slips. When the people you once trusted show you, without doubt or disguise, exactly who they are. Not who they pretend to be in public.Not who they claim to be in family group… Read More When They Show You Who They Are — Take the Whole Family to Court If You Must
Part of the “Healing Through Intimacy” SeriesPsychological Perspective on Safe, Attuned Relationships There are few things more soul-soothing than being with someone who just understands you — no long explanations, no performing, no overthinking. Just… knowing. That gentle, intuitive dance where they make all the right moves — not because they’ve studied you like a puzzle, but… Read More 🌹 When They Just Get You: The Healing Power of Being Known
There are moments in life that speak a language words cannot touch — and one of the most intimate of these is locking eyes with someone while making love. It may seem like a simple act — holding a gaze — but psychologically and physiologically, it’s one of the most powerful and vulnerable things two… Read More ✨ Sexual Safety & Soul Connection: The Psychology of Eye Contact During Lovemaking ✨
Linda C J Turner | Trauma Therapist & Emotional Healing Specialist 