Seeing pleasure, enjoyment, or stimulation in an abuser’s eyes while they commit acts of cruelty or violence is one of the most terrifying and chilling experiences a victim can endure. This isn’t just about anger or loss of control—it signals sadistic tendencies, where the abuser derives satisfaction from causing pain, fear, and helplessness. What Does This Mean? Can They… Read More Higher Risk of Severe Harm or Death
When an abuser has severe anger issues and is prescribed medication but refuses to take it, this adds another layer of danger to an already volatile situation. The fact that they choose not to take their medication means they are fully responsible for their escalating violence. This is not just “losing control”—it’s a conscious decision to let their anger and abusive tendencies… Read More Unpredictability & Constant Fear
When an abuser resorts to strangulation and other forms of physical abuse, they instill a deep, primal fear in their victim—one that goes beyond the immediate threat of physical harm. This kind of violence is particularly terrifying because it signals the abuser’s willingness to take complete control over the victim’s life, even to the point… Read More Fear of Death (Terror & Survival Instinct)
Abusers do not simply harm their victims with physical or emotional abuse—they also work systematically to strip them of their support systems, leaving them vulnerable, isolated, and entirely under their control. One of the most insidious ways they do this is by targeting the people their victims love the most: family, friends, and anyone who… Read More The Tactics of an Abuser: Isolation, Control, and Destroying Support Systems
Abusers thrive on control. They cannot bear to see their victims happy, independent, or fulfilled because it threatens their grip on power. One of the most insidious ways they maintain control is by systematically destroying anything that brings their victim joy—birthdays, Christmas, holidays, special occasions, and even lifelong dreams. My move to Spain, something I… Read More The Destruction of Joy: How Abusers Sabotage Happiness
Love is not a convenience. It does not turn on and off to suit the needs of those who only see relationships as transactional. When an abuser is in denial and has spread lies to friends and relatives, there is no going back. The damage is done, and the trust that forms the foundation of… Read More When the Abuser is in Denial: Love is Not a Switch
Living with someone who only shows anger is like walking on a minefield where every step feels unpredictable, yet the outcome is always explosive. You tread carefully, trying to avoid triggers, but no matter how much you anticipate or try to appease, the eruption always comes. It’s exhausting — physically, emotionally, and mentally. The absence… Read More Emotionless
In April 2024, after 32 years of marriage, he announced that he had a girlfriend. The revelation came as a shock, not just for its betrayal but for the speed with which he moved on. Then, in June, he was diagnosed with prostate cancer. Almost immediately, he declared that he was dying, a statement that… Read More Speaks Volumes: A Story of Manipulation, Lies, and Abuse
Emails have become a crucial tool in legal battles, often serving as undeniable proof of coercion, manipulation, and attempts to isolate individuals from their support systems. When family disputes escalate, particularly in cases involving financial settlements, inheritance conflicts, or abuse allegations, emails can reveal the true nature of those involved. Emails as a Weapon of… Read More The Power of Emails in Exposing Coercion and Manipulation in Legal Disputes
A serious serial abuser facing a double court appearance for criminal behavior is likely to be in full self-preservation mode, doing anything they can to manipulate the situation in their favor. Their tactics will depend on their personality, past behaviors, and level of desperation, but here are some common things they might do in the days leading up… Read More Protecting Yourself
Linda C J Turner | Trauma Therapist & Emotional Healing Specialist 