Category: Child abuse

Child abuse refers to the intentional harm, neglect, or mistreatment of a child, whether it is an act of commission (doing something harmful) or omission (neglecting to do something necessary for a child’s well-being). Child abuse can take various forms and may occur within families, communities, or institutions. It is a serious and widespread social issue that can have profound and lasting effects on a child’s physical, emotional, and psychological well-being.

Sadistic Pleasure

Sadism in a psychological context involves deriving pleasure from causing pain or suffering to others. In this case, the ex-prison officer may derive this pleasure through psychological harm rather than physical violence. Psychological sadism can manifest as emotional manipulation, gaslighting, humiliation, and degrading the victim over time. This slow erosion of the teenager’s mental and emotional well-being would provide the abuser with a sense of dominance and gratification.… Read More Sadistic Pleasure

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The Psychological Impact of Lying for the Abuser

When an abused person is in denial and covers up or even lies for their abuser, it is often a result of the deep psychological impact of the abuse. This response is not uncommon in abusive relationships, where the victim is caught in a cycle of manipulation, fear, and confusion, making it extremely difficult for them to see the situation clearly. This behavior can stem from a combination of emotional trauma, fear of retaliation, feelings of dependency, and even love or loyalty toward the abuser. Let’s explore why this happens and how it affects the abused person’s ability to break free.… Read More The Psychological Impact of Lying for the Abuser

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The Erosion of Empathy

The deliberate exposure of teenagers to violent or gruesome sights in an attempt to “toughen them up” is not just misguided—it is dangerous. It erodes their natural capacity for empathy, leading to emotional numbness, mental health issues, and dangerous behaviors toward family members and pets. Empathy is vital to healthy development, and when it’s compromised, the effects ripple through a teenager’s life in harmful ways. Rebuilding empathy through trauma-informed care, role modeling, and emotional support is essential for helping these teens develop into emotionally healthy adults capable of forming compassionate relationships.… Read More The Erosion of Empathy

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Psychological Trauma

Exposing a teenager to violent or traumatic sights—whether it’s real-life violence, graphic imagery, or criminal activities—can result in emotional trauma. Teens are still developing cognitively and emotionally, and witnessing traumatic events can overwhelm their ability to process these experiences. This could lead to: Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD): Repeated exposure to traumatic sights can lead to flashbacks, nightmares, and hypervigilance.

Emotional Numbing: To cope with the horrors they witness, the teenager may shut down emotionally, becoming desensitized not just to violence, but to other aspects of life, such as joy, compassion, or love.… Read More Psychological Trauma

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Tough Love

When harmful or abusive behavior is disguised as “tough love,” especially towards a teenager, it can create a very damaging dynamic. What is often called “tough love” in these cases can be a cover for emotionally manipulative or controlling behavior, and it might normalize unhealthy patterns in how a young person understands relationships and boundaries.… Read More Tough Love

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Sadistic Tendencies or Emotional Cruelty

Forcing someone to relive trauma, especially when they weren’t present for it, and causing them significant emotional harm—can be deeply troubling. There are several reasons why someone might engage in such harmful behavior, though none of them justify the emotional damage inflicted. Understanding their motivations may help shed light on the dynamics of the situation, though it’s important to remember that this kind of behavior is wrong and damaging.… Read More Sadistic Tendencies or Emotional Cruelty

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Police Intervention

Coercive Control: In countries like the UK, coercive control is a specific offense under the Serious Crime Act 2015. This law covers patterns of controlling, coercive, or abusive behavior in intimate or family relationships. If the coercive behavior involves manipulating someone’s mental state or restricting their freedom, the police could potentially take action, even without physical violence.

Drug Supply: Providing drugs, such as ketamine, is illegal in most jurisdictions. The person supplying the drugs for free, especially as a form of emotional blackmail, would be committing a crime. If this is reported, the police would likely be more focused on the drug supply aspect, as it’s a clear legal violation.

Vulnerable Individuals: If the person trying to quit drugs is seen as vulnerable (which is likely in a case of addiction), the police and other authorities may treat the situation with even more urgency. Drug addiction can increase a person’s vulnerability to abuse and exploitation, which could amplify the seriousness of the coercive control.… Read More Police Intervention

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When control become dangerously blurred

Lonely and Isolated Themselves: The manipulator may be extremely isolated and fearful of being abandoned, leading them to latch onto the person in rehab as their primary (or only) source of emotional connection. They might have an untreated mental illness, such as depression or anxiety, that fuels their need to keep the other person close at all costs.

Struggling with Their Own Trauma: Often, people who manipulate others have unresolved trauma or emotional wounds of their own. Instead of addressing their pain, they may seek control over someone else as a way of avoiding their own feelings of helplessness.

Subconsciously Afraid of Being Left Behind: The manipulator might see the other person’s recovery as a threat. If the person in rehab gets better, they may move on with their life and leave the manipulator behind, worsening their feelings of loneliness and abandonment. To prevent this, they may subtly sabotage the recovery process.

Addicted Themselves: In some cases, the manipulator may also be struggling with addiction. They may encourage continued drug use because they’re not ready to give up their own substance use, and they feel safer in a dynamic where both people are using.… Read More When control become dangerously blurred

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How to Identify Covert Control Disguised as Help

Guilt as a Tool: A hallmark of manipulative behavior disguised as help is the use of guilt to maintain control. For example, a person might say, “I’m only doing this because I care about you,” while making the recovering individual feel guilty for needing help or for mistakes they’ve made in the past. True support empowers someone to grow and make independent choices, while covert control keeps them feeling indebted or ashamed.

Conditional Support: Someone who truly cares offers unconditional support. In contrast, a person who is manipulating will offer help conditionally, often expecting obedience or compliance in return. If the recovering person doesn’t do what is expected, the “help” might be withdrawn or turned into a point of contention.

Undermining Confidence: A manipulative person often subtly undermines the recovering individual’s confidence under the guise of “helping” them avoid further mistakes. They might repeatedly bring up past failures or weaknesses, saying things like, “You can’t trust yourself to handle this,” or “You know you’ve always messed up before.” This creates dependency on the manipulator for decision-making or emotional support, all while eroding self-trust.

Isolation as “Protection”: Manipulative individuals might try to isolate the person in rehab from others who could offer real support by framing it as a way of “protecting” them. They might suggest that other people “don’t really understand you” or “will only hurt you,” encouraging dependence on them alone. This isolation further enhances their control.… Read More How to Identify Covert Control Disguised as Help

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